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Don't Fall in Love: The Secret Lives of Two Gay Soldiers Hiding in Plain Sight
Not yet published
Expected 4 May 27The tumultuous true story of two active duty gay combat soldiers fighting for love, happiness, and their country against all odds — before, during, and after Don't Ask Don't Tell. The decorated officers served in three wars and deployed to five continents, forging a lifelong friendship navigating the evolving perils of the policy together, hiding in plain sight.
The "compromise" was designed to loosen their shackles, but Don't Fall in Love draws back the curtain on how it made life so much worse — forcing brutal compromises and pitting their life's calling against happiness with the men they loved. It seemed to doom any serious relationship, but they were soldiers, so they fought.
Born on the eve of Stonewall, their lives tell the story of the liberation of our military and the entire LGBT equality movement, through their insightful eyes.
The "compromise" was designed to loosen their shackles, but Don't Fall in Love draws back the curtain on how it made life so much worse — forcing brutal compromises and pitting their life's calling against happiness with the men they loved. It seemed to doom any serious relationship, but they were soldiers, so they fought.
Born on the eve of Stonewall, their lives tell the story of the liberation of our military and the entire LGBT equality movement, through their insightful eyes.
Hardcover
Expected publication May 4, 2027
About the author
Dave Cullen
4 books62k followersI wrote the New York Times bestsellers COLUMBINE and PARKLAND: BIRTH OF A MOVEMENT.
FINALLY coming May 4, 2026: Don't Fall in Love: The Secret Lives of Two Gay Soldiers Hiding in Plain Sight, fwhich I’ve been working on for 26 years. (11 concurrently with the other books, shadowing Army buddies ‘Brett’ and ‘Drake’ the whole time.) It’s the biggest project I will undertake in my lifetime.
I had to write this gay soldiers' story, because I'm a gay ex-infantry soldier, but not at the same time. DON'T FALL IN LOVE is the tumultuous story of two active duty combat arms soldiers fighting for love and happiness against all odds. They served 23 years and deployed to three wars in hiding — before, during, and after Don't Ask, Don't Tell. They're courageous, insightful and wickedly funny, and it's been one hell of a ride.*
Columbine won several major awards, including the Edgar, Goodreads Choice Award, and Barnes & Noble Discover Award, and made 2 dozen Best of 2009 lists. It made LA Times' list of the 30 best books of the last 30 years, and Slate's list of the best books of the last quarter century. It has been translated into nine languages, and named to a few dozen Best True Crime Books of All Time lists. It's fourth U.S. edition, the 25th Anniversary Memorial Edition, was published in April 2025, with a new preface.
I've worked on several TV project and sold one pilot to NBCUniversal, earning my WGA card. On the media side, I've written for New York Times, Vanity Fair, Atlantic, London Times, Politico, Guardian, Washington Post, New Republic, BuzzFeed, etc., and appeared on most of the major networks in the US, and across Europe, Asia, Australia and South America. I live in Chicago, where I'm uncle to 11 cool humans and 1 adorable corgi, Bobby Sneakers.
* The gay soldiers book began as a magazine story in June 2000, that won the GLAAD Media Award for best online story of the year. To protect them from discharge, we named them Brett and Drake then and disclosed it in they story. They were never discovered. They'll reveal their identities in the book this fall.
FINALLY coming May 4, 2026: Don't Fall in Love: The Secret Lives of Two Gay Soldiers Hiding in Plain Sight, fwhich I’ve been working on for 26 years. (11 concurrently with the other books, shadowing Army buddies ‘Brett’ and ‘Drake’ the whole time.) It’s the biggest project I will undertake in my lifetime.
I had to write this gay soldiers' story, because I'm a gay ex-infantry soldier, but not at the same time. DON'T FALL IN LOVE is the tumultuous story of two active duty combat arms soldiers fighting for love and happiness against all odds. They served 23 years and deployed to three wars in hiding — before, during, and after Don't Ask, Don't Tell. They're courageous, insightful and wickedly funny, and it's been one hell of a ride.*
Columbine won several major awards, including the Edgar, Goodreads Choice Award, and Barnes & Noble Discover Award, and made 2 dozen Best of 2009 lists. It made LA Times' list of the 30 best books of the last 30 years, and Slate's list of the best books of the last quarter century. It has been translated into nine languages, and named to a few dozen Best True Crime Books of All Time lists. It's fourth U.S. edition, the 25th Anniversary Memorial Edition, was published in April 2025, with a new preface.
I've worked on several TV project and sold one pilot to NBCUniversal, earning my WGA card. On the media side, I've written for New York Times, Vanity Fair, Atlantic, London Times, Politico, Guardian, Washington Post, New Republic, BuzzFeed, etc., and appeared on most of the major networks in the US, and across Europe, Asia, Australia and South America. I live in Chicago, where I'm uncle to 11 cool humans and 1 adorable corgi, Bobby Sneakers.
* The gay soldiers book began as a magazine story in June 2000, that won the GLAAD Media Award for best online story of the year. To protect them from discharge, we named them Brett and Drake then and disclosed it in they story. They were never discovered. They'll reveal their identities in the book this fall.
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Displaying 1 - 5 of 5 reviews
Want to Read
June 15, 2018This nonfiction book about the long-term relationship of two soldiers isn't to be published until 2022 [a postponement of its earlier pub. date], but I'm excited about it because the author, Dave Cullen, has worked on it for many years. His track record, based on the admirable Columbine (about the Colorado school shootings), gives me reason to believe there might be another masterwork in the making.
Cullen's book about the Florida school shootings, PARKLAND, was published in February of 2019.
(Updated February 25, 2021)
Cullen's book about the Florida school shootings, PARKLAND, was published in February of 2019.
(Updated February 25, 2021)
December 6, 2020
I’m not sure why Goodreads is allowing ratings on a book that’s not even out yet, but since there are too many jerk faces giving it 1 star, likely based on the subject matter, I’ll go ahead and give it 5 and say I can’t wait to read this book and buy multiple copies to send to all my friends and family.
April 13, 2025
Haven’t read it yet as it hasn’t even been published. But, as others are also doing, I’m trying to balance out the fear-mongers who are giving it 1 star over their own insecurities.
August 12, 2026
Dave Cullen is a remarkable writer and I look forward to reading this in 2027.
Want to Read
September 22, 2026This is finally coming out! Whoops. Pun not intended, but I'm leaving it.
Displaying 1 - 5 of 5 reviews