Don't You Know I Love You

by Laura Bogart

The last place Angelina Moltisanti ever wants to go is home. She barely escaped life under the roof, and the thumb, of her violent but charismatic father, Jack. Yet home is exactly where she ends up after an SUV plows into her car just weeks after she graduates from college, fracturing her wrist and her hopes to start a career as an artist.

Angelina finds herself smothered in a plaster cast, in Jack's obsessive urge to get her a giant accident settlement, in her mother Marie's desperation to have a second chance, and in her own stifled creativity - until she meets Janet, another young artist who inspires her to push herself into making the dynamic, unsettling work that tells the story of her scars, inside and out. But excavating this damage, as relations with her father become increasingly tense, will push Angelina into making a hard choice: will she embrace her father's all-consuming and empowering rage, or find another kind of strength?

Genres: Fiction, Contemporary, LGBT, Lesbian, Queer

224 pages, Paperback

First published March 17, 2020

Reviews

[Elle · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is an extraordinarily well-written family drama, with all the insidious carryings of the cycle of abuse married with a coming-of age-story that results in the reader feeling physically exhausted by the weight of it. The story follows a young art school graduate who ends up in a car crash which obliterates any chance that she had for independence, and so she travels back home. Through this, we learn that her father is almost certainly a narcissistic abuser and her mother his enabler, who never speaks up, and so it feels like you walk on eggshells along with the characters the whole way through. The father character is especially notable for his resemblance to reality- down to the Mafioso films and the spruiking of his greatness at work.

I thought this was extremely well written, with the characters coming to life on the page and getting deep into the heart of the reader. The dog was especially sweet, and was a pivotal symbol for what the characters were going through as well as being a faithful companion. I also really enjoyed how this spread out into other relationships and showed the impact that abuse can have on all of those we love throughout our lives. I just wish it were a bit longer- I wanted to know so much more about these characters and where they ended up!

[Judi Pfancuff · Rating 5 out of 5]

I bought this because I saw the author’s comment on Twitter that she was bummed her book coming out during the pandemic. I had no idea what it was about. I didn’t read the blurbs. Just ordered it on Amazon and dive in the day it arrived.

I found the subject matter challenging, but handled with a surprising amount of skill by such a young author. The characters and the story rang true to an almost painful degree. Angelina and her father both deserve our compassion, which is only clear because of the authors skill.

Great read and fantastic first effort.

[Heather Young · Rating 5 out of 5]

A deeply compassionate look at the long shadow of childhood abuse that frames both the abused and, surprisingly, the abuser as complex, flawed, and damaged human beings. The story is firmly centered on Angelina, a young woman forced to return to her childhood home and the father whose years of physical and mental abuse have left her almost irreparably damaged. Yet while the narrative offers no forgiveness for the deeds of the father, it gives us a clear-eyed understanding of what drives his rage and obsessive need to control his daughter. Because he is so much more than just an abusive-father "type," his cruelty is all the more harrowing, and Angelina's struggle to break the emotional chains of her past and find healing through art is made powerfully and uniquely her own.

[clumsyplankton · Rating 4 out of 5]

Extremely well written had me hooked the entire time

[Margo Littell · Rating 5 out of 5]

The trauma at the heart of Don’t You Know I Love you manifests in every aspect of Angelina’s life. Her arm breaks in a car accident, forcing her to return to her parents’ house. Old wounds from her father’s physical abuse, never fully healed, reopen when it’s clear his love for her is as twisted as it ever was. Her capacity to love is continually challenged as her father’s anger and impulsiveness rise to the surface against her will. Her relationship with fellow artist Janet crumbles under the weight of behaviors and beliefs that Angelina can’t control. Eventually, through her art, Angelina finds an outlet for the complicated tangle of her family life, ultimately giving her a foothold in a new kind of adulthood--separate from her father’s abuse and her mother’s silence, separate even from the self she recognizes. Breaking old patterns is as painful and shocking as breaking a bone, and Bogart shows us that healing in either case requires a tough resilience in both flesh and soul. At its heart, Don’t You Know I Love You is a gorgeously written celebration of a young woman’s victory over her own life.

[Michele · Rating 5 out of 5]

Skillfully written story of the patterns violence leaves in one young woman’s art and life. As another reviewer noted, it felt like I was walking on eggshells along with the characters as the protagonist’s father spoke, gestured, and threatened in archetypal male batterer rhythms. As a survivor of child abuse and domestic violence, it was a difficult read for me emotionally, but I kept reading because the story kept me interested on multiple levels, especially the subplot of how the protagonist’s art changes as she dissects her past.
The violence in the book is shocking. It never felt gratuitous, but it might be traumatic for some readers. Highly recommend with that caution in mind.

[Julianne Diaz · Rating 5 out of 5]

Don't You Know I Love You follows our protagonist Angelina, a recent art school graduate struggling to find her voice in the world. A freak car accident hurdles Angelina into her childhood home in a rental car and a newly rescued dog. There she deals with her childhood trauma, impending settlement, and falls for Janet another upcoming artist who gives her the strength to face her inner darkness and put them on canvas. Bogart delivers a riveting tale of love, abuse and finding one's voice in a novel way. The story does a great job of capturing the realities of the 21st century for young aspiring artists. Although a starving, pained artist is nothing new Bogart shines a light on heavy topics through illustrious word choice and metaphors. Readers can expect a whirlwind of emotions as Angelina heals from her emotional and physical wounds while trying to stand her ground. The story is a must-read for anyone who has gone through trauma and trying to find their place in the world after they have treaded deeps waters. The romance is not overbearing but highlights the realities of what it is like to have a partner dealing with emotional and physical discourse. The turmoil within the family from the event that has taken place in their home and how the build-up of years has not given way to forgiveness.

The novel does not have many shortcomings. Although the topic is not original the delivery through expert prose breathes life into the heavy topics. In just over 200 pages Bogart captures years of pain, love and a broken family while juggling the protagonist struggle to normalcy. It is an incredibly relatable tale that not many dare to discuss over coffee. It is worth mentioning however that hose who have not fully recovered from abuse or those who may feel triggered by abuse should pass over this read. There are highly detailed and gory accounts throughout the book.

Overall the book is definitely worth reading and is a very quick read

Dzanc books did send me an advanced reader copy for review however, I did not receive compensation and I gave my honest review.

[Ola Hol · Rating 4 out of 5]

A pretty good novel on domestic violence, a difficult father-daughter relation and how it bears on later relations. It offers a insight into the impossibility of escaping similarities to a close person that sparks contradictory emotions. Seems to have a rhythm of a film, a Hollywood production, which is probably I don't give it more than 4 stars. The strong point is the dog's role in the story. Even though it features an art school graduate, it lacks the narcissism of let's say Patti Smith's Monday Children, and there is even a reference to those "cool" artists working from Chelsea Hotel. Additionally, it involves an implied criticism of the American health system and precarity that many suffer, however, without preaching or angry manifestos.

[Talia · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was hard for me to read. The scenes of domestic violence were frightening and it’s juxtaposition with “loving moments” between mom/dad dad/daughter were disturbing. I can never truly understand how/why one parent takes the “side” of the abuser and makes excuses for or allows the abuser to abuse the children. There was nothing now holding the mother back from protecting her daughter but yet again she chose not to. As I finished this book I am not sure I would recommend it to anyone. Too triggering. While the ending is a bit uplifting it still left me feeling hopeless.

[theStorykeeper · Rating 1 out of 5]

DNF pg39

You. Don't. Tell. Abuse. Stories. From. The. Abuser's. Perspective.

I don't f--king care. No excuses. The point of abuse stories is that they give voice to the victims. The abuser already has a voice. They have had a voice this whole time. They do not get to have more stories written about them.

You also don't need to use gross potty humor and vulgar sexual language for shock value in a work of adult literary fiction.

The daughter, who I thought was going to be the MC, had yet to display a lick of personality or emotion.

[Tucker · Rating 5 out of 5]

Follows a young woman who dearly wants to mature as a visual artist and to achieve professional success. Explores the inspiration/perspiration conundrum, i.e. where does art come from and how does it get made?, at least from this fictional character's point of view. Can art be a way to process physical injury and recovery? Does artistic skill develop within relationships? People who have struggled to feel confident in their own art may relate to this character.

[April · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'm thinking 3.5 rounded up. Definitely an interesting read but it didn't hold my attention each time I picked it up.

[Mark · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow, this is a difficult read, emotionally, but we'll worth it.

[Caitlin · Rating 5 out of 5]

Complex, compassionate, queer, visually rich—could have kept reading and reading!

[Mary Jane Davis · Rating 2 out of 5]

Found this book extremely frustrating. Domestic abuse, a lesbian relationship and a dog rescue but NOTHING resolved by the end of the story.

[Sarah Bouffard · Rating 2 out of 5]

well written account of domestic violence but just a very bland plot