In My Heart

by Bette Hawkins

“Dorothy leaned in, her velvety lips touching mine…”
It’s the spring of 1958 and amateur guitarist/songwriter Alice Johnson feels like a stranger in her small Southern town. Everyone knows her business and is pushing her to settle down and marry like all the other young women in town. Only Alice’s love of music provides an escape from the stifling expectations of family and society.
One night, Alice hears the mesmerizing voice of up-and-coming country singer Dorothy Long and is immediately entranced. Dorothy becomes Alice’s muse, inspiring her to write songs for Dorothy—even though she never imagines that Dorothy will hear them.
But then she finally meets Dorothy and her life turns upside down. Soon Alice finds herself on the road, and not just sharing the stage—but sharing a hotel room—with her idol. Now what is Alice going to do with the unexpected desire that seems to consume her?

Genre: Romance
Editor: Medora MacDougall
Cover Designer: Judith Fellows

Genres: Historical, Music, Celebrity, Romance, Historical Fiction, Slow Burn Romance, Lesbian

228 pages, Paperback

First published August 16, 2019

About the author

Bette Hawkins is a social worker who hails from Melbourne Australia. She lives with her long-term girlfriend and their very spoiled dog. In addition to writing, Bette’s favorite pastimes include playing the guitar, watching films, cooking, and reading.

Reviews

[Lex Kent · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a really enjoyable read. I’m a Hawkins fan. This is her third book and I have enjoyed all of them. I like how she writes and her books just work for me. However, I do have a weird relationship with historical fiction books. I’m always worried about reading them- because of what women went through in the past, but I almost always like them once I’ve read them. What is great about this historic fiction book is that you can put it more in the feel good category. While this book doesn’t try to rewrite history and make it easy to be gay in the 50’s, it gives you hope and it’s not a book that will depress you. After the last book I read I needed some happy and some hope and this book gave me both.

The main premise is about a woman who writes country music. She writes these songs and wishes she could give them to her favorite singer to sing. If you have ever seen the movie Walk the Line, parts of this book reminded me of that movie. Even the main character Dorothy was a lot like June Carter-Cash who left her family band to go out on her own. You feel like you are transported into the time of A and B side records and just the feel of the 50’s. I thought it was well written and also a very readable story.

I don’t really have many complaints to mention. It is not really a wow book, but for what it was- a book about a band touring in the 50’s with two women that are developing possible feelings, I think the story worked. There is a little angst to keep things interesting and I was surprised to look down and see I had reached the end of the story. The story was so easy to read that I was ready to keep reading more.

If you are looking for a historic-fiction-romance, especially one that is more on the feel good side, I would recommend this one. Hawkins has become an automatic read for me so I can’t wait to see what she puts out next.

An ARC was given to me for a honest review.

[Pin · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is the third romance novel by Bette Hawkins, all of which I have read. With each book her growth as an author and storyteller is unmistakable. In My Heart is a well-written romance with good pacing and dialogue. The interesting plot is about two strong talented women, country music, small-town mindset, being different...
I really liked both main characters, and there were some good secondary characters. The setting, 1958 American South, plays a very nice role in the narrative, nicely capturing the position of women, without being overbearing. The book is written in first person, from the point of view of the protagonist Alice. It can be a difficult task, but it was well done here. I found it very suitable for plot development that Alice slowly reveals her story, and that we readers follow these discoveries and other protagonist Dorothy through her eyes. In My Heart is primarily about Alice's personal growth and her story to tell.
All in all, a really enjoyable story which I will read again. I recommend it, and am looking forward to the next book by the author.

4 stars
June 23, 2019
*A review copy of this book was provided by the publisher.*

[Joc · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is the first novel I’ve read by Hawkins and it was a really lovely experience. Alice is a young woman living in a small town in the late 50s. Her love of music, particularly country music, is not something her parents and siblings really understand. Neither is her obvious lack of interest in dating. The record shop owner, Bill, seems to get her though and happily drives her to a nearby town to hear her icon, Dorothy Long, play. Alice dreams of Dorothy and writes songs for her voice but doesn’t expect to ever meet her.

I’m always a little nervous about lesbian romances with a historical setting because I’m never entirely sure that everything is going to work out. This story manages to avoid the expected bigotry while still maintaining the illusion of the time period. Names like Dorothy, Alice, May, Earl and Dirk fitted perfectly into the 50s setting and the occasionally stilted dialogue actually enhanced the atmosphere rather than detracting from it.

The story is told from Alice’s point of view in third person but she notices so much about Dorothy mannerisms and expressions that I didn’t feel like she was an unknown. I enjoyed the way their romance unfolded once they found the courage of expression. I’ll definitely be reading more by Hawkins.

Book received from Netgalley and Bella Books for an honest review.

[Carrie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Discovering sexual identity in the 1950s.

Alice is a 24 year-old switchboard operator in a small town. She is also a self taught guitar player who writes songs. She meets the singer she is infatuated with, Dorothy, when attending a concert. After listening to Alice's music and lyrics, Dorothy invites Alice to join the band and go on tour.

This story unfolds entirely from the perspective of Alice. We are shown her small town life. She lives at home with her parents. Feeling like an outsider, she spends most of her free time with her aunt May. Drinking, listening to shows on the radio, and playing music.

It was refreshing to have a character that already was aware of her sexual preference. There was no discovery here. Of course, being the 1950s, she had to keep it under wraps.

Dorothy was hot and cold throughout the entire book. And although there were moments of discussion between the two, I didn't think it was ever fully explained. I didn't feel like Dorothy ever did anything to make up for it or give any indication that the behavior would change. This negatively affected how I responded to their growing relationship.

The author built a real chemistry between the two by having them writing songs together, singing, dancing, shared glances, being in each other's space, touches, etc.

Side characters were great, but I felt like there was a missed opportunity to have Dirk be a confidant to Alice later in the book.

I wish there would have been dividers between scenes. That threw me off several times while reading.

Overall, I enjoyed this.

I recommend to those who like romance, music, guitars, honky-tonks, road trips, and hotel rooms.

I received an ARC from the publisher for an honest review.

[Karen · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was my first time reading a book by Bette Hawkins and I have to say I enjoyed it. This romance is set in the 50's where it wasn't safe to be queer. Dorothy Long is a country singer. When Alice first heard her, she was a part of a country singing trio with her sisters. She has since gone out on her on as a solo singer. Alice is a lover of music and has self taught herself how to play the guitar. She is also a very talented song writer, but she doesn't think she will go anywhere because she lives in a small town and works at a phone company. One night her and her buddy travels to Mobile to hear Dorothy perform. This trip changes her life as she get the opportunity to write and perform with Dorothy's band.

I really wasn't sure what to expect from this one because I haven't read a lot of romances set in the 50's or during the era where being queer meant you had to keep it a secret. The story line was enjoyable and I enjoyed the chemistry and interaction between Dorothy and Alice. Normally I am not a fan of any Angst, but this one works really well. I also enjoyed the supporting characters and how most of the characters were very likable. There really wasn't much that I did not like. If anything the ending seemed a tad bit rushed.

I will gladly rate this one a strong 4 stars.

This arc was provided by Netgalley and the publisher for an honest review.

[Best Lesfic Reviews · Rating 4 out of 5]

An extremely well-written sweet, simple story set in the 1950s. This is a slow unfurling romance (distinctly different from slow burn) in keeping time period it is set in.

Read the full review @ https://bestlesficreviews.blogspot.co...

[Jude Silberfeld-Grimaud · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5* rounded to 4*

It’s 1958 and Alice doesn’t expect much from life. She works at the phone company, she spends time with her aunt May and her new friend Bill whose father owns the record shop, she plays her guitar and writes songs. Then one Friday night on the radio she hears Dorothy. Before falling in love with Dorothy, Alice fell in love with her voice. When she gets to meet her, she falls in love with her. That’s when her life changes completely as Dorothy asks her to join her band as a guitarist and as a songwriter.

In My Heart is a sweet romance. Alce is sweet and innocent, not innocent as in she doesn’t know life, more like she hasn’t let life pollute her hopes. Her story makes for an enjoyable and easy read, with just enough angst to make it interesting.

I received an ARC from the publisher in exchange for an honest review.

[Betty · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love to read historical fiction, so In My Heart by Bette Hawkins caught my eye immediately. The cover also got my attention and let me know the story was probably set in the 1950’s. I was correct in my assumption.
The story is set in 1958 in a small Southern town. The tale is told in first person POV through the eyes of Alice Johnson, a twenty-five year old woman who is still living with her parents. She is an amateur guitarist and songwriter when she is not working as a telephone operator. When she hears a new country artist named Dorothy Long on the radio, she becomes inspired to write songs specifically for her voice. Through a set of circumstances, she gets to meet Dorothy, and everything changes for both of them.
This is my mother’s generation. I was just a baby when this story takes place, and my mother would have been just a few years older than Alice. We also lived in a small town in the deep South, probably not that different from where Alice lives. This is the age where LGBTQ+ folks could not come out publicly. Being out meant you could lose everything from your family to your friends, job, and freedom. On top of this, women had few rights at that time. By Alice’s age, she was supposed to be married and a housewife with children, not working and living with her parents. This is the backdrop of the story and affects how all of the characters in the book act. I liked how the author kept the focus on the romance of the two main characters. The homophobia and misogyny is inferred in the secondary characters and does cause problems for Alice and Dorothy, but never really becomes overt in the novel.
This is a story of survival; of finding happiness in a world that is definitely against LGBTQ+ folks having that. To me it was a positive story, a feel good story in spite of the setting. I thoroughly enjoyed the book.

I received an ARC from NetGalley and Bella Books for an honest review.

[Aleana · Rating 4 out of 5]

I received an ARC copy of this book from the Publisher via Netgalley and voluntarily leaving my review.

Alice feels more like a stranger in her hometown her family wants her to be married with children while she wants to play her guitar and writes songs.

When she here Dorothy singing who was part of band but now striking out on her own she becomes Alice muse and when opportunity to see Dorothy she never imagine she would here her songs and as to be in her band.

Alice start to feel that she okay with having feelings toward women then she does men and even though she starts to feel more for Dorothy she afraid of acting on it because Dorothy is married to Earl but she doesn't know the reason they are married and when she does and romance between them may happen.

I like how process of writing songs and how some sound better fast or slow I like that Alice wasn't afraid to live her dreams. This was a good read but I like her other book No More Pretending better.

[H M · Rating 5 out of 5]

Lovely I fell in love with everything in this book. I honestly think I could read it had it been more without getting board. and that only happened with one or 2 writers.


thank you for the author for giving me the opportunity in exchange of honest new opinion

[Heather Bennett · Rating 4 out of 5]

In My Heart is a fantastic historical novel. The characters and storyline are interesting. The book is well written. I would read more by this author.

[Skye Kilaen]

I'd seen a lot of compliments for this book, and I liked so much about the sample, but... both of the negative male characters so far have been described as fat, using unflattering language and imagery, without any positive fat characters to balance that out. It's left a bad taste in my mouth and regretfully I'm not going to be interested in reading the rest.

[MEC · Rating 4 out of 5]

For a number of reasons I wasn't too sure if I'd like this one - historical setting, country music, southern US setting. Surprise surprise - it sucked me in and I loved it. Set in 1958 in small town Southern US and focused on the early days of the country music circuit, this is a really sweet and gentle romance. The setting gives it a bit of a nostalgic feel, but Hawkins keeps things realistic and the setting comes alive. Hawkins provides enough detail to set the scene and give the reader a feeling of being in the moment without resorting to dumping information and context.

Narrated by Alice, In My Heart follows her struggle to find her place in the world. There's a wonderful innocence and inner strength in Alice - smothered by her life in a small southern US town, she wants more than to follow in the footsteps of her mother and sister, she wants to make her own way in the world and make her own mark. I especially appreciated that Hawkins wrote Alice within the context of the time and place - in some novels, the main characters openly, and rather unrealistically, challenge the societal norms but Alice's resolution and rebellions are subtle and small - working with her wild aunt May (she drinks gin and tonics on Friday nights, plays records and has a gentleman friend ... pretty wild for Alice's family) at the phone company, silently vowing that she doesn't need to marry in order to be happy, leaving her home to join to write and play with a band and buying pulp novels on the sly. Alice's challenging of the norms are personal and she never settles or gives in - she is remarkably self aware and accepts her differences - and actively chooses to follow her heart and dreams.

There are no "big bads" or dastardly events in this - just real people and the lives they lead. The secondary characters are well developed and the interactions with Alice and her family have an authentic feel - her parents especially being so stoic and practical and not really understanding their daughter, but they is still a strong unspoken love and you know they want the best for her even if is something so far out of their own knowledge or experience. Alice's friend Bill is wonderfully and subtly drawn - the words gay or lesbian are never used or acknowledged but he and Alice find themselves to be kindred spirits not only in their love of music but also in their acceptance that neither of them fit in.

Dorothy, the lead singer from the band, is talented, bright and confident - everything that Alice wants to be and the relationship builds slowly. Alice is drawn to Dorothy by her voice, and falls deeper under her spell as they spend more time - initially, there's lots of adoration from afar as Alice realizes she is crushing hard, but as the two spend more time together, the bond and relationship builds. Dorothy may be more certain and experienced, but she is also more cautious and careful than Alice - which gives this a slow burn build up. It also propels a bit of angst as Dorothy's caution pushes them apart but the resolution works and emphasizes Alice's inner strength and building confidence.

This isn't a long book but Hawkins uses the time she has with the reader to focus on the characters and creates a wonderfully sweet romance.

Strongly Recommended.

[Angie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Alice, who’s in her mid twenties, is on the brink of spinsterhood. Or at least that’s the messaging she hears on a daily basis in her small Southern town where her future seems bleak. Especially because she doesn’t want to get married, although she’ll entertain a date here and there if she has to. But Alice has a good job as a phone operator, so all she wants to do is save enough money for a car and, in her free time, write songs on her guitar and imagine Dorothy Long, a burgeoning country music star, singing them.

So when Dorothy’s band comes to play in a nearby city, Alice makes sure she’s at the show. And then a series of surreptitious events happen and she’s actually playing one of her written-for-Dorothy’s-voice songs to Dorothy Long herself. And from that moment, Alice’s life, changes. Dorothy invites her to join the band and write more songs.

There’s just something about a lesbian romance set around the country music that really speaks to me. And it’s not because I’m a huge country music fan—my only real foray into that scene was for 9 months in the 90’s—but maybe because homosexuality is (perceived to be) much less accepted in that space? I don’t know. But this story hit so many good notes for me and even inspired me to pick my woefully-forgotten guitar back up again.

In My Heart is the second Bette Hawkins novel I’ve read and so far she’s 2-for-2 with me. I can’t wait to read more.

[Jasmine · Rating 4 out of 5]

Alice spends her days working at a phone company in her small town and her spends her spare time with her passion, playing guitar. When she hears Dorthy Long's voice on a record, she's inspired to write her own songs. On whim she travels to hear her and her band play, and she soon finds herself auditioning to be the newest member of the band and resident songwriter. Their feelings towards each other grow as they travel the country together, but is there a place for their relationship in 1958 and in the country music world?

This is my second book by this author and I enjoyed them both quite a bit. There were a few things that kept this from being a perfect five star read for me, but for the most part I really liked this book. I liked both characters, especially Alice. I felt like the explanation for Dorthy's "moods" was missing and could have added a lot to the story. I loved all the supporting characters, it made for a very warm and cozy read in what I'm sure must have been a trying and harsh environment for a new, female-led, act trying to make it big. The conflict for the ending seemed too dramatic an unrealistic and had me rolling my eyes a little. But in the end I like how the book fulfilled Alice's own dreams from the paperbacks she read. It was a really sweet story, the chemistry was intense, and I think the writing was well done, drawing us into this historical fiction setting.

I received an ARC via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

[Darlene Vendegna · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is an outstanding novel on all fronts. It is a wonderful look into the 1950s country music scene, through the eyes a small town girl with a talent for song writing and aspirations of meeting her singing idol. The characters are diverse, realistic and interesting. I loved these people, especially the main characters, and was genuinely invested in the two of them being able to be together. The main character discovers some pulp novels, so the reader gets a first hand experience of what it may have been like for a young lesbian, who thinks she's the only one, to realize that she's not alone. That was a lovely touch that really added to the story and to my engagement with the character. I would and will recommend this romance novel to anyone looking for a little slice of history mixed in with a sweet romance. Well done Bette Hawkins, I look forward to reading more of your stories. I don't give a lot of five star reviews, but when I feel a little bit of a hangover upon completion of a book, or I find myself wondering what the characters did next, that's a fiver.

[Cathy Williams · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is my first time reading a Bette Hawkins' novel and I have to be honest..... it won't be my last.

BH really know's how to write, and as a reader she kept hooked, I've never been one for historical fiction but once started I didn't put down

This is a wonderfully written story, the romance between Dorothy and Alice is enjoyable.

I would certainly recommend this novel, a very good read.