(Disclaimer: I was provided an advance copy of the book "Never Enough" by Mike Hayes from the publisher, Celadon Books. I was not paid to write this review and the thoughts presented are entirely my own.)
Navy SEAL: those two words conjure up many other words upon reflection. Mental toughness, physical stamina, top of the class, a "don't quit" attitude, elite forces, etc, etc, etc. I could go on and on and on listing different words that describe this world-class group of highly-trained men. Hayes, in his recently released book, "Never Enough," goes in a different direction than other books I have read re: special forces or those who have spent time therein.
The book is broken into three sections: 1) Never Excellent Enough, 2) Never Agile Enough, & 3) Never Meaningful Enough. What I really enjoyed about this book is that the material conveyed can be applied to any sphere of life. One does not have to be a Navy SEAL or even in the Armed Forces to apply the principles laid out in the book. Hayes excels in supporting the principles/truths in each chapter with personal experiences from commanding U.S. Navy Seal Team Two, from the White House as a White House fellow serving under Presidents George W. Bush & Barack Obama, and from his stints in leadership roles in large companies here in the United States.
One of the things that impressed me with this book is that the author did not use profanity to share the truths contained therein. Too many books by military personnel (or former military) are filled with profanity. While they have every right to publish a book with that type of language, I was thrilled that Hayes kept this book free of that type of language. From that perspective, I could heartily recommend this book to a grandparent or a grandchild (in the near future) with no reservations. The Bible is clear that "out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh" (Matthew 12:34) and I appreciate this aspect of the book. This is not to say that this book is not hard-hitting and full of strong challenges!
I do have one disagreement with the author about life philosophy. Actually, it was surprising that he included this tidbit. In the third section entitled "Never Meaningful Enough," he states the following:
"No Matter What You Believe In, Believe in Something"
In my opinion, that mantra is much of the crazy philosophy being taught in much of public education today. And to read this from a Navy Seal surprised me. Why? He has fought against some radicals that actually REALLY believe in something. Something so much they are willing to blow themselves (and many others) up for. So, no, I disagree with that philosophy. It is key that a person believes the RIGHT things to believe in.
Apart from that one item, the author challenged me re: life principles throughout the entire read. Toward the end of the book, there were three principles the author seeks to live by that resonated with me. They are as follows:
1) Be intrusive in people's lives
2) Be a do-er rather than a be-er
3) Push to have real impact on the people's lives around you
As Hayes concluded his thoughts, there were several anecdotes that really got to me. Without giving them away, one of them brought me to literal tears while the other one had me saying, "No way! He's talking about that Dan?!"
I recommend this book to others and most likely will be giving some copies away myself.
Here are some excerpts I found inspiring:
"We are who we are at our worst. That's how you measure someone's character: you see how they respond not in the 99.9 percent of life when they're comfortable, but in the 0.1 percent when they're not...Seeing how someone acts when they're truly stressed in some way is a far better indicator of character. Some people think that those hard moments give them a good excuse to deviate from the highest moral and ethical standard, to mistreat others, to speak poorly about colleagues or friends, or to otherwise act illogically. Nothing could be further from the truth. When things are genuinely difficult - physically, intellectually, or emotionally - that's when you have the greatest opportunity to prove to others (and to yourself) what you are made of."
"However you get there, don't let your emotions control you. Do what makes the situation better, not necessarily what makes you feel better...emotions help us at times, allowing us to act with compassion and warmth, but during difficult situations, we need to put our emotions aside and approach our decisions in a clear-sighted, rational way."
"We need to remember that calm breeds calm."
"Being humble enough to admit what you don't know but still confident enough to explain where you can add value is a balance that is often hard to strike...our job in any room is to find the best answer for the problem we're working on, no matter whose answer it is."
"True excellence means accepting blame even more quickly than we take credit, and sharing that credit with everyone around us."
"Confidence and humility are not different points on the same line. They are entirely different axes and states of mind. You can be confident that you have something to contribute, and at the same time recognize that you're not the only one who has value to add."
"Do the hard things, get comfortable with discomfort, orient yourself in the service of others, and live a life of honesty and integrity."
"The higher up you are in an organization, the more you need to understand that it's not your job to make the best decision - your job is to ensure the best decision gets made."
"If we never fail, we're clearly not pushing ourselves hard enough."
"The tone of an organization starts with the leader. The tone of any team, of any size, starts with the leader - so if you are the leader, you need to be especially conscious of what tone you set."
"The best leaders don't need credit, and aren't afraid to accept blame."
"Real leaders know that any one person's success is their success. Real leaders are happy when they're able to step aside and put others in a position to receive credit. Real leaders just need their people and their organization to win."
"People who are insecure in their role don't want to work with people better than themselves, don't want to delegate tasks to others who might actually do them well, and aren't putting the needs of the team first."
"The only reasons not to hire someone better than you center around discomfort and fear."
"We have to be willing to intrude, to ask the hard questions and have the hard conversations - or we're not really making a difference...small talk is easy, but getting someone to be vulnerable, emotional, and honest can be hard. And yet without those deeper conversations, we can never really get to know each other."