[arc review]
Thank you to NetGalley and St. Martin’s Press for providing an arc in exchange for an honest review.
Adelaide releases April 18/2023
This review was published aug24/22 and reflects the review copy and synopsis I was given at the time (which included: "With wonderful friends and fierce ambitions, Adelaide has little interest in finding "The One" right now. But when she meets Rory Hughes on a dating app—a charming Englishman who's been placed there by fate, she swears—that all changes. All of a sudden, Adelaide finds herself completely in love [...] Adelaide is convinced that if she just tries and fights and loves a little harder, he'll fall for her as deeply as she's fallen for him. (He has to... right?) Because it's clear to Adelaide that their fate was written in the stars [...] A millennial love story [...]) however since then, there have been changes across all retailers. I still stand by what I said below.
The premise of this was intriguing, but this was painful to read. And not because it was emotionally moving - because it wasn’t (at least not for me). Now, I’m not trying to gloss over the severe mental health and suicide ideations in this because those are heavy and sensitive topics, but this was the furthest thing from a romance or love story, in my opinion. If anything, it was more centered around friendship? (I know this is a women’s fiction but the entire book is about a romantic relationship). There was nothing to show that this was brought upon by “fate”. The relationship depicted was extremely toxic, unhealthy, and showed many red flags.
I also could not get past the writing style with the abundant need to exclude all proper quotation marks for dialogue.
TW: mental health, suicidal ideations, emotional and sexual abuse, r*pe, grief, stomach ulcers, bipolar disorder, manic depression, anxiety, ocd, miscarriage, endometriosis, uses the term harem in context with cults, mentions donald trump & pro-life.
Adelaide is split into quite a few sections — before/during/after, as well as spring/summer/autumn/winter.
It’s set in the UK and is mainly told from the pov of the main character Adelaide, but has a few parts featuring Rory.
The start of this story packs a punch - immediately immersing the reader into the tailend of Adelaide’s suicide attempt. Thus, the rest of the story is the build up to what lead to that moment.
I struggled to ever feel any type of chemistry between these two main characters.
My main gripe was that Rory truly was not in any position to be in a relationship to begin with. He had a lack of commitment, and was too hung up about an ex-girlfriend. The way he demanded and expected certain actions but never cared to reciprocate any was laughable. You want a man to ghost you, essentially feel like a friend zone, a tier less than friends with benefits? Sure, swipe on Rory on your dating app.
Adelaide falls head first, all-in love with Rory (why? who knows, because this man truly does not even do the bare minimum) / (the diagnosis at the end of the book regarding Adelaide makes this make a tad more sense, but still not really. The mental health rep could have been handled better).
The compassion, kindness, and 150% effort that Adelaide exuded was very one sided. She gave her all for this man, in the hopes that he would love her too, only for it to completely and utterly wear her out, break her to rock bottom and lead to suicidal ideations.
The message at the end of the book where it said that Adelaide was the one meant to appear in Rory’s life at the right time, and not the other way around - felt conflicting. Yes, I get that there are instances where people come into our lives for a reason (whatever that might be), but I strongly don’t believe that in doing so, it should exert so much of yourself that the only other option of relief is suicide. So unhealthy.
Rory as a whole:
- notoriously horrible for never responding to messages.
- makes the fmc either leave his house so he can sleep, or makes her sleep on his FLOOR.
- if it’s after midnight and she’s politely asking to crash at his house because cab drivers make her feel uneasy, he’ll say “go take a ten minute walk to the night bus in the pouring rain.”
- calling ahead to their hotel to request two separate beds when you’re on holiday with the person you’re dating.
- the ONLY time he texted back immediately or regularly was if sexts/nudes were involved.
- complains when the fmc goes out of her way to make him food that contains meat (she’s a vegetarian) and instead of saying thank you, grunts about it upsetting his stomach ulcers.
- when asked about his girlfriend Adelaide, he says “oh, Adelaide, her name didn’t even cross my mind.”
- immediately runs to set up a dating app profile at the slightest hint of a “break” + never deletes it when they’re still intimate.
- “he wanted the perks that came with dating a woman like Adelaide” - okay gross, women are actual human beings with feelings, not some customizable package where you can select add-ons to your choosing.
Content that was personally off-putting/questionable as a reader:
- using the word harem in the same sentence as referencing cult behavior. In light of recent discourse surrounding the trope term “reverse harem” and changing it to “why choose” because of authentic concerns from the affected communities - the wording here can use some heavy revision.
“It was always difficult to capture the firm’s cultlike essence when speaking to anyone who hadn’t lived it—which, she supposed, was also true of actual cults and harems.”
- having the fmc at the age of 26 straight up pee her pants in the streets of London? I mean, I could have done without reading that.
- Including mentions of Donald Trump and pro-life on the same page as when the fmc is experiencing a miscarriage due to endometriosis. I realize that this was probably written before events of 2022, but it’s being published well afterwards, and I think it’s a very sensitive and controversial statement that does not need to be included.
Overall, I think I would have liked to seen less of Rory/Nathalie and his grief, and more of how Adelaide was able to rebuild coming out of a toxic relationship, with the support of her friends, as well as processing her new bipolar disorder diagnosis.
“Oh golly, no, I’m not American. I don’t just mask things with pills.”
“She struggled with hot-and-cold behavior. It was triggering for her. Unhealthy.”
“Sickness feels different when it takes place inside your head. When the illness flows through the chemicals of your mind rather than clogged sinuses or broken bones. No illness is ever really linear.”