My rating: 4 1/2*
So, I was pretty much useless all day yesterday, because whenever I wasn't reading this story my mind was in la-la land thinking about it. I finished it this morning around 3AM, because despite the fact that I could barely keep my eyes open I was literally so entrenched in this story that I could not break away without reading to the end. Unfortunately, finishing it didn't help much with getting it off my mind! Finding Home is just one of those books that gets under your skin, breaks your heart, makes your pulse race, and leaves you breathing a huge, hard-earned sigh of relief.
My summary:
Sean (Mouth) is a hustler who makes a 'living' by selling himself on the streets, and although he's nearly an adult, he's still young at only 17. Hopeful journalist Megan meets 'Mouth' when she's attempting to interview kids on the street, so she can write a story about their plight for her job at the newspaper. He opens up to her little by little, and he helps her meet the other kids that work the area. Megan finds herself drawn to Mouth, returning to talk with him even after she finishes her article. When she finds him limping and beaten one day, she insists he come home with her and stay until he's healed. He's not happy to take Megan's charity, having taken care of himself for so long, but Megan gives him the opportunity of a lifetime. Clean, away from the work on the streets, with food and a roof over his head, Sean uses his second chance to change his life. Megan is determined to not let him return to the life he had before, but their time together becomes increasingly tension-filled as she denies the mutual attraction between them. At 23, she knows having sex with Sean is wrong even though he stopped being a 'kid' years ago. When that wall finally comes down (OH MY GOD, it was cold-shower-enducing HOT!!!), Megan knows she can no longer resist him. But indescribable passion doesn't equate to a functioning relationship, and Megan and Sean have one challenge after another when it comes to people accepting what they are to each other. It seemed destined to fail, but what they have may just be strong enough to make it through.
I was concerned about the plot for this story being something that I couldn't swallow. First off, reading about children selling themselves and allowing men to use them for pleasure just makes my stomach ill. And I was wondering how a romance could be built around a character like Sean, after all he'd done and been through. I must say I was so blown away when I read this story, because it was handled in a way that made my feelings about Sean shift along with the story. There's no denying the initial reaction to Sean/Mouth, he's just walking, breathing sex appeal (incidentally, the picture on the cover does NOT do my imaginary Sean justice by any means...the cover should have just had a silhouette, because this guy doesn't fit Sean's description at all). I hated what he and all of the kids were doing to themselves, it was so upsetting to read about. And with Sean, the fact that he had to have this shameful lot in life and then sat and described it to Megan...that was painful to read. He acts as though it doesn't affect him, but deep down you could tell how sickened and embarrassed he was by it. He'd just shut himself down to avoid thinking about it. The other kids on the street were all younger and had even less hope of going anywhere, and Megan's clinical treatment of each of them got to me at times. She was in full-on reporter mode for most of her time down there, but I was happy to see her emotions come into play when she saw Sean injured. She was worried about him, and the protective side of me was so relieved when Sean agreed to stay with Megan. He so truly deserved that chance to turn his life around, and he really grabbed onto it when Megan offered. Sean was just the good-looking teenager who was getting help from the adult who really cared for him, and it warmed my heart to see him finally have that.
Like I said before, though, my feelings toward Sean shifted right along with Megan's, which was really surprising and impressive when it comes to the writing. As Sean and Megan spent more time together, I slowly started seeing him as less child and more this strong, sensual, mature young man that left me weak at the knees. He never really was a 'child' when Megan met him, anyway, because he was forced to take care of himself long before then. And now, he's suddenly making his life better thanks to her support, but he was also going out and working to get what he earned. He was truly a man in my eyes, so when the tension between him and Megan started to boil over, I was fanning myself at every turn!! And yes, that scene when Megan fully becomes aware of just how much she wants him...words can not explain how sexy that moment was, I think my heart was ready to beat out of my chest!!! Wow, wow, WOOOOOOOOOW Sean just parked himself very high on my sexy book boyfriends list!! Whew!
The struggles that Sean and Megan face with her friends and family accepting their relationship were many. It seemed at every turn, Sean dealt with judgement from someone, and it upset me so much to see him have to be scrutinized like that. After all he'd been through, I wanted Megan to just tell everyone to take a flying leap when they looked down their noses at him. It wasn't right, he deserved nothing but encouragement and tenderness. In fact, my issues with Megan's behavior are where the half star was removed in my rating, I just wanted her to consider his feelings over her own more often. After pondering over this book for a day, I feel like, in a way, it was just that Megan really saw Sean as her equal, her lover. She didn't think of him as a former prostitute, so she didn't coddle him like he was. I think this is what ultimately gave Sean the strength to make the hard decision he did, because he wanted to really BE equal. He wanted to feel like he deserved Megan, and that's what made this story really just heartbreakingly beautiful for me. I do wish we got to see more of Megan and Sean's future in the end (epilogues...use them!!!!), but I was still immensely happy with how their story ended.
This book definitely found it's home in my heart, I absolutely loved it and will certainly be re-reading it in the future!