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Father Figure
This is an Illustrated Novel NOT a manga or graphic novel
Sypnosis:
A deep obsession with his estranged father leads Gabriel down a dangerous, twisting path.
The novel contains 19 illustrations by TogaQ. And the story is written by Kichiku Neko.
Sypnosis:
A deep obsession with his estranged father leads Gabriel down a dangerous, twisting path.
The novel contains 19 illustrations by TogaQ. And the story is written by Kichiku Neko.
120 pages, Paperback
First published November 1, 2011
45 people are currently reading
2128 people want to read
About the author
Kichiku Neko
51 books465 followersName: 鬼畜猫: Kichiku Neko (ナルキッソス)
Name (in native language): 猫鬼畜
Associated Names:
Guilt | Pleasure
G|P
KichikuNeko
narcissus
Sadistic Cat
Birth Place: Taiwan
Doujinshi Circle: Guilty Pleasure (G|P) with CHEN Jo
In Real life she is a cop. She is also a Taiwanese.
Horoscope: Scorpio
Favorite Places: Rome, Italy; Normandy, France.
Favorite Movies: Tampopo and Shall We Dance? (Japanese Version)
Hobbies: Travel; BL Manga/Novels/Drama CDs
Secret Lust: Men in sharp, expensive suits or uniforms
Genres: Drama / Mature / Psychological / Smut / Yaoi
Email: kichiku_neko@guiltpleasure.com
Social Networking:
http://kichiku-neko.livejournal.com/
https://twitter.com/Kichiku_Neko
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Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 30 of 196 reviews
December 20, 2014
This is the best most terrible book I’ve read in a long time and I cannot recommend it to anyone.
No spoilers, unlike in some of the other reviews, sigh.
When I was a little bugger, my mum had to ward off my attempts at touching the hot oven, that for unfathomable reasons held an incredible attraction. Until one day I succeeded, after which tears, blisters, bandages and a brand new My Little Pony heralded the end of an obsession. In a greedy crusade for the next, perfect read that would leave me feeling utterly mind fucked, I came across Father Figure. Turns out it was exactly like that oven from my youth; fascinating, dangerous and above all...very painful.
I feel strangely empty and unsettled still. Haven’t been able to pick up anything else. Cheerful reads seem to mock and taunt this pitiful state Kichiku Neko put me in. And if today wasn’t the first real day of spring in The Netherlands, I’m not even sure if I could’ve forced myself into writing this review. As it is, the beaming sun helps to create just enough distance to relive this book, without the echoes of nausea becoming too strong.
Father Figure is harshly compelling in its simplicity. A young cop tracks down his biological father, stalks him, and eventually abducts him. However, he is not interested in a short get-away to catch up for lost time. Once his mad, delusional love for his father is fueled by the man’s physical presence, it tips over into a destructive obsession.
Often, in these types of stories you experience the events through the eyes of the victim. Here, you’ll find yourself in the mind of the troubled cop instead. Not that he is a one-dimensional psychopath. Father Figure packs a psychological punch: there are only victims of a love so intense that it spirals into horrible tragedy. The cop’s POV is a hit. It adds a new dimension of uncomfortable intimacy to a already claustrophobic setting, the secluded cabin where the son has taken his victim.
What follows is an assault on your senses. Starting with stomach-churning tenderness and non con at its most twisted (there’s never a doubt that what transpires between these characters is anything other than non-consensual). I found the very first scenes somewhat titillating, a reaction that made me feel conflicted and ashamed. Especially so when Kichiku Neko (the fact that the author’s actually a cop in real life is perhaps the most mind fucking tidbit of all, GUFFAW! I mean, imagine! :D) proceeded to built up the sickening anticipation excellently. The plot kept reaching new levels of ‘wrongness’, only emphasized by the – considering the subject matter – disturbingly gorgeous illustrations of TogaQ (19 in total! Hell yeah!). A dream combination that will leave you feeling mind fucked as well as eye fucked.
Please mind the content warnings though! (incest, non con, darker than dark!) The other day, a friend asked me how I would compare this on a darkness scale of 1 to 10 to, let’s say Bloodraven. Well, in my eyes Bloodraven would get a 5, maybe a 6, whereas Father Figure scores a solid 9. I feel burned and marked. This story took something from me that I will never be able to get back: my faith in humanity, ha! But I have no regrets. Seldom have I read anything this thrillingly realistic and entirely free of self-censorship. If you’re feeling a little blasé about your latest reads, I dare you to read Father Figure...
Though it might also be a good idea to check out my all time favorite sucker-punch of a Yaoi In These Words, Volume 1 by the same authors first. Compared to Father Figure, it’s almost a romantic stroll in the park.
No spoilers, unlike in some of the other reviews, sigh.
When I was a little bugger, my mum had to ward off my attempts at touching the hot oven, that for unfathomable reasons held an incredible attraction. Until one day I succeeded, after which tears, blisters, bandages and a brand new My Little Pony heralded the end of an obsession. In a greedy crusade for the next, perfect read that would leave me feeling utterly mind fucked, I came across Father Figure. Turns out it was exactly like that oven from my youth; fascinating, dangerous and above all...very painful.
I feel strangely empty and unsettled still. Haven’t been able to pick up anything else. Cheerful reads seem to mock and taunt this pitiful state Kichiku Neko put me in. And if today wasn’t the first real day of spring in The Netherlands, I’m not even sure if I could’ve forced myself into writing this review. As it is, the beaming sun helps to create just enough distance to relive this book, without the echoes of nausea becoming too strong.
Father Figure is harshly compelling in its simplicity. A young cop tracks down his biological father, stalks him, and eventually abducts him. However, he is not interested in a short get-away to catch up for lost time. Once his mad, delusional love for his father is fueled by the man’s physical presence, it tips over into a destructive obsession.
Often, in these types of stories you experience the events through the eyes of the victim. Here, you’ll find yourself in the mind of the troubled cop instead. Not that he is a one-dimensional psychopath. Father Figure packs a psychological punch: there are only victims of a love so intense that it spirals into horrible tragedy. The cop’s POV is a hit. It adds a new dimension of uncomfortable intimacy to a already claustrophobic setting, the secluded cabin where the son has taken his victim.
What follows is an assault on your senses. Starting with stomach-churning tenderness and non con at its most twisted (there’s never a doubt that what transpires between these characters is anything other than non-consensual). I found the very first scenes somewhat titillating, a reaction that made me feel conflicted and ashamed. Especially so when Kichiku Neko (the fact that the author’s actually a cop in real life is perhaps the most mind fucking tidbit of all, GUFFAW! I mean, imagine! :D) proceeded to built up the sickening anticipation excellently. The plot kept reaching new levels of ‘wrongness’, only emphasized by the – considering the subject matter – disturbingly gorgeous illustrations of TogaQ (19 in total! Hell yeah!). A dream combination that will leave you feeling mind fucked as well as eye fucked.
Please mind the content warnings though! (incest, non con, darker than dark!) The other day, a friend asked me how I would compare this on a darkness scale of 1 to 10 to, let’s say Bloodraven. Well, in my eyes Bloodraven would get a 5, maybe a 6, whereas Father Figure scores a solid 9. I feel burned and marked. This story took something from me that I will never be able to get back: my faith in humanity, ha! But I have no regrets. Seldom have I read anything this thrillingly realistic and entirely free of self-censorship. If you’re feeling a little blasé about your latest reads, I dare you to read Father Figure...
Though it might also be a good idea to check out my all time favorite sucker-punch of a Yaoi In These Words, Volume 1 by the same authors first. Compared to Father Figure, it’s almost a romantic stroll in the park.
September 8, 2014
WOW!
Best book I've read in a long time but before I start with my review I have a question for 26 people... 26 people shelved this as ROMANCE? Seriously? Did we read the same book or did I get the FUCKED UP version? Or maybe those 26 people need to visit their doctors? ;) Joking! Don't hate me pretty please.
BTW, what a nightmare to buy this book!!! I could only buy my copy in Kobo (needless to say, first and last time I buy anything on their website). My bank (ING DIRECT) called me after 3 attempts saying I was trying to make a fraudulent purchase asking me even for the title of the book, I have never EVER blushed harder in my freaking life, thanks God they could not see my face. Whatever, I finally got it, after Jahy's help because converting a book from Kobo's format to mobi was another nightmare I don't want to talk about. THANKS Jahy for your help!
Ok, back to the book. Don't many any assumptions because this book IS NOT WHAT YOU THINK. You have NO IDEA what you are getting into but if you are scared because you think you can't handle incest, let me tell you the author won't make any romance out of it.
This is the story of a 23 yo scared kid (yes, he's still a kid) who needs to feel the love of his family and his last opportunity presents when he meets his father for the first time.
You know when you see a child crying and shouting and you know he's just trying to call for attention? This also happens with old people who feel alone... I think this book is about this but of course taken to a super fucked up level.
Gabriel is not a very lovable character but you'll end up feeling bad for him and somehow you want the best for him even if the best is not what he wants.
It's so complicated to review this book without spoilers so I am very sorry for not making any sense.
Please READ THIS BOOK, I know it's completely OUT of your comfort zone, I am pretty sure you won't get aroused by the sex scenes but I promise something different, a great read with complex characters that are part of a game whether they want to play or not.
P.S. Loco said the author is a cop... OMG! The things she must have seen to be inspired to write this story. And she's Scorpio like me (yeah, you got it right, sex machines hehe)
September 8, 2014
***********4.5 "ABSOLVING" STARS ***********
How does one go about creating a bond after 23 years,which should have been spawned at birth? Hopefully not in the manner in which I'm about to tell you.
After the death of his mother, 23 year old Gabriel learns the identity of his estranged father, Uriel. He becomes fixated on learning as much as possible about his absent parent . Gabriel decides a two week vacation at a secluded cabin is just what they need to form a loving farther-son relationship. Great idea, right? Not quite, Uriel's unaware of his sons existence. Gabriel drugs his father and the two men travel to a cabin without Uriel's consent.
Uriel awakes and the truth is quickly revealed. Folks, this is NOT a heart felt moment. Gabriel's methods of forming a father son bonding experience is more like father-son bondage experience . Yup, these two become as close as two individuals can PHYSICALLY get and I'm not talking about a hug. I normally try my damnedest not to spoil, and I think you can gather where the story is headed, but just in case, I will make it crystal clear here-->
This was a very difficult read. I had to stop numerous times because the book made me feel queasy, enraged,squirmy, and I'm not talking aroused squirmy, I'm referring to the ick squirm(<-- Really? dumb is me, but I don't know how else to explain it ) It felt like bugs were crawling on me while I was reading <--- ICK ! Towards the end all I felt was melancholy.
I normally DNF books when a heroine refers to her love interest as "daddy", SO WHY THE HELL DID I KEEP READING THIS STORY???? Honestly, in its own disturbed and twisted way Father Figure is one of the most compelling, distressing, stunningly forgiving stories I've ever read( Here I go, not making sense again...just go with it please). The author not only tells you a fascinating story, she shows the reader as well with numerous GRAPHIC illustrations which depict scenes in EXPLICIT detail.
I know this review DOES NOT do the book justice. My apologies to the author but the book has left me spent. Uriel has forever left a ring around my heart <--- Huh? Guess you have to read it to understand....
Ebook Link: http://store.kobobooks.com/en-us/book...
For more reviews, Free E-books and Giveaways
How does one go about creating a bond after 23 years,which should have been spawned at birth? Hopefully not in the manner in which I'm about to tell you.
After the death of his mother, 23 year old Gabriel learns the identity of his estranged father, Uriel. He becomes fixated on learning as much as possible about his absent parent . Gabriel decides a two week vacation at a secluded cabin is just what they need to form a loving farther-son relationship. Great idea, right? Not quite, Uriel's unaware of his sons existence. Gabriel drugs his father and the two men travel to a cabin without Uriel's consent.
Uriel awakes and the truth is quickly revealed. Folks, this is NOT a heart felt moment. Gabriel's methods of forming a father son bonding experience is more like father-son bondage experience . Yup, these two become as close as two individuals can PHYSICALLY get and I'm not talking about a hug. I normally try my damnedest not to spoil, and I think you can gather where the story is headed, but just in case, I will make it crystal clear here-->
This was a very difficult read. I had to stop numerous times because the book made me feel queasy, enraged,squirmy, and I'm not talking aroused squirmy, I'm referring to the ick squirm(<-- Really? dumb is me, but I don't know how else to explain it ) It felt like bugs were crawling on me while I was reading <--- ICK ! Towards the end all I felt was melancholy.
I normally DNF books when a heroine refers to her love interest as "daddy", SO WHY THE HELL DID I KEEP READING THIS STORY???? Honestly, in its own disturbed and twisted way Father Figure is one of the most compelling, distressing, stunningly forgiving stories I've ever read( Here I go, not making sense again...just go with it please). The author not only tells you a fascinating story, she shows the reader as well with numerous GRAPHIC illustrations which depict scenes in EXPLICIT detail.
I know this review DOES NOT do the book justice. My apologies to the author but the book has left me spent. Uriel has forever left a ring around my heart <--- Huh? Guess you have to read it to understand....
Ebook Link: http://store.kobobooks.com/en-us/book...
For more reviews, Free E-books and Giveaways
April 9, 2023
gotta love some father and son bonding time... this was disturbing, sad and truly messed up. the illustrations were beautiful.
January 8, 2015
5 Stars for being such a Unique Taboo Read that Scrambles My Senses
Blood relation, just how important is that? How strong could that bond be? Is it possible to love a total stranger? Especially if that stranger shared an unbreakable bond with you?
Gabriel developed an unhealthy obsession with a man, a stranger he had hoped to get to know better and ultimately be loved by. Uriel was the father he had longed for ever since he was a child. He was bitter when he found out Uriel has a happy little family of his own now and a favored son two years his junior upon leaving his mom behind. He hated the other woman who took away what should have been his and his alone. No one should compete with him for Uriel's attention and affection. Uriel owed him that. And he will make sure his father understands it even if he has to hurt him in order for him to learn. Afterall as the saying goes "spare the rod, spoil the child", an ironic phrase for them but it is one Gabriel deemed as the right recourse to steer his Father's affection towards him.
What transpired between this pair of long-lost father and son upon their ill-fated meeting was supremely taboo and disturbing enough to make you feel so wrong and conflicted for even reading it, yet you will find it hard to stop. You just had to know why, why Gabriel did what he did, and to find out what would Uriel do to salvage both of them from any further destruction? Do we really owe that much to our own child? How much are we willing to sacrifice for own flesh and blood?
Love can be the most beautiful thing in this world. Love can also be the ugliest thing when directed by a distorted perception. Love can be hellish. To a man like Gabriel, to love is to possess wholly, to claim full ownership, to be kept close by his side irregardless of consequences. I am still unsure if all those vile acts Gabriel subjected on Uriel is even remotely redeemable.
Since the story is narrated all by the perpetrator himself, we would get to feel his every volatile emotion and his twisted reasoning. At times, the intensity of his insanity makes me shudder with disbelief and horror. Books of such nature fascinates me till no ends. Being in the mind of a delusional, unstable person gives our mind such a great workout. Needless to say, there's never a dull moment in this book. My adrenaline was kept high throughout the reading.
I must say, the angst in this story is just superb. It has precisely the right amount to keep me satisfied and on a constant emotional high.
Okay, to be on the blunt side, this is a taboo book and it is ILLUSTRATED. I repeat, IT IS ILLUSTRATED. The taboo acts are ILLUSTRATED. There, I got it off my chest and feeling much better already. I can assure you that TogaQ's artwork is to die for and the illustrations are aptly applied. It heighten the experience and shake up our emotion. If you wanna know, there are a total of 19 illustrations in this book. I wish I could show some of it here but I had to refrain from spoiling the story and lessening the shock effect. Plus I would hate to be flagged by those well-meaning-GR-police. I must clarify that not all of the illustrations are smutty, there are a couple of those safe-for-work types too.
If you are those who aren't easily disturbed by taboo reads that contains high level of incest with a dose of dark psychological and criminal theme, then this book should be a winner for you. Angst addict would definitely adore it too. As for those looking for sweet romance.. please look elsewhere. The only romance to be found here is an utterly twisted one.
On account of how much this story had lodged itself deep within me, a 5 stars rating is a given thing. In fact, most books that graces my 5 stars shelf are those that had left its indelible mark on me.
Side note to all: For sake of world peace and personal safety; NEVER EVER have unprotected sex, NEVER EVER forsake your own children. OR you might just find yourself reliving Uriel's nightmare.
BOOK DETAILS:
Title: Father Figure
Author: Kichiku Neko (Author), TogaQ (Illustrator)
Publication Date: November 2011
Publisher: Guilt|Pleasure (Doujinshi Circle)
Type: Illustrated Novel - approximately 31,000 words, 19 illustrations
Genre:M/M, Gay, Taboo, Incest, Dominance-Submission, Noncon, Psychological Thriller, Drama
Tags/Keywords: gay, incest, taboo, dominance-submission, non-consensual, thriller, psychological, maledom, domineering male, rape, corporal punishment, caning, bodily harm, injury, murder, restraints, collar, leash, chain, hand-job, blow-job, oral sex, anal sex, rough sex, kidnap, captive, captivity, confinement, unstable mind, psychological disorder, mental disorder, obsession, stalker, stalking, voyeurism
Description:
A deep obsession with his estranged father leads Gabriel down a dangerous, twisted path.
This is an Illustrated Novel NOT a manga or graphic novel. It contains 19 illustration by TogaQ and the story was written by Kichiku Neko.
ABOUT BOOK COVER DESIGN:
Sharing an interesting pic here. This is the novel's cover walkthrough.
Click on the image to go to the direct link for more info.
WHERE TO BUY:
PAPERBACK
EBOOK
* Reviewed on November 21st, 2013
*:--☆--:*:--☆:*:--☆--:*:--☆--:*:--☆--:*:--☆:*:--☆--:*:--☆--:*
Blood relation, just how important is that? How strong could that bond be? Is it possible to love a total stranger? Especially if that stranger shared an unbreakable bond with you?
Gabriel developed an unhealthy obsession with a man, a stranger he had hoped to get to know better and ultimately be loved by. Uriel was the father he had longed for ever since he was a child. He was bitter when he found out Uriel has a happy little family of his own now and a favored son two years his junior upon leaving his mom behind. He hated the other woman who took away what should have been his and his alone. No one should compete with him for Uriel's attention and affection. Uriel owed him that. And he will make sure his father understands it even if he has to hurt him in order for him to learn. Afterall as the saying goes "spare the rod, spoil the child", an ironic phrase for them but it is one Gabriel deemed as the right recourse to steer his Father's affection towards him.
What transpired between this pair of long-lost father and son upon their ill-fated meeting was supremely taboo and disturbing enough to make you feel so wrong and conflicted for even reading it, yet you will find it hard to stop. You just had to know why, why Gabriel did what he did, and to find out what would Uriel do to salvage both of them from any further destruction? Do we really owe that much to our own child? How much are we willing to sacrifice for own flesh and blood?
Love can be the most beautiful thing in this world. Love can also be the ugliest thing when directed by a distorted perception. Love can be hellish. To a man like Gabriel, to love is to possess wholly, to claim full ownership, to be kept close by his side irregardless of consequences. I am still unsure if all those vile acts Gabriel subjected on Uriel is even remotely redeemable.
Since the story is narrated all by the perpetrator himself, we would get to feel his every volatile emotion and his twisted reasoning. At times, the intensity of his insanity makes me shudder with disbelief and horror. Books of such nature fascinates me till no ends. Being in the mind of a delusional, unstable person gives our mind such a great workout. Needless to say, there's never a dull moment in this book. My adrenaline was kept high throughout the reading.
I must say, the angst in this story is just superb. It has precisely the right amount to keep me satisfied and on a constant emotional high.
Okay, to be on the blunt side, this is a taboo book and it is ILLUSTRATED. I repeat, IT IS ILLUSTRATED. The taboo acts are ILLUSTRATED. There, I got it off my chest and feeling much better already. I can assure you that TogaQ's artwork is to die for and the illustrations are aptly applied. It heighten the experience and shake up our emotion. If you wanna know, there are a total of 19 illustrations in this book. I wish I could show some of it here but I had to refrain from spoiling the story and lessening the shock effect. Plus I would hate to be flagged by those well-meaning-GR-police. I must clarify that not all of the illustrations are smutty, there are a couple of those safe-for-work types too.
If you are those who aren't easily disturbed by taboo reads that contains high level of incest with a dose of dark psychological and criminal theme, then this book should be a winner for you. Angst addict would definitely adore it too. As for those looking for sweet romance.. please look elsewhere. The only romance to be found here is an utterly twisted one.
On account of how much this story had lodged itself deep within me, a 5 stars rating is a given thing. In fact, most books that graces my 5 stars shelf are those that had left its indelible mark on me.
Side note to all: For sake of world peace and personal safety; NEVER EVER have unprotected sex, NEVER EVER forsake your own children. OR you might just find yourself reliving Uriel's nightmare.
I ran my fingers through his hair; it was soft. There was a kind of excitement that went through me then that felt sexual. This man was my father. He used to belong to someone else and now he belonged to me.
BOOK DETAILS:
Title: Father Figure
Author: Kichiku Neko (Author), TogaQ (Illustrator)
Publication Date: November 2011
Publisher: Guilt|Pleasure (Doujinshi Circle)
Type: Illustrated Novel - approximately 31,000 words, 19 illustrations
Genre:M/M, Gay, Taboo, Incest, Dominance-Submission, Noncon, Psychological Thriller, Drama
Tags/Keywords: gay, incest, taboo, dominance-submission, non-consensual, thriller, psychological, maledom, domineering male, rape, corporal punishment, caning, bodily harm, injury, murder, restraints, collar, leash, chain, hand-job, blow-job, oral sex, anal sex, rough sex, kidnap, captive, captivity, confinement, unstable mind, psychological disorder, mental disorder, obsession, stalker, stalking, voyeurism
Description:
A deep obsession with his estranged father leads Gabriel down a dangerous, twisted path.
This is an Illustrated Novel NOT a manga or graphic novel. It contains 19 illustration by TogaQ and the story was written by Kichiku Neko.
ABOUT BOOK COVER DESIGN:
Sharing an interesting pic here. This is the novel's cover walkthrough.
Click on the image to go to the direct link for more info.
WHERE TO BUY:
PAPERBACK
EBOOK
* Reviewed on November 21st, 2013
*:--☆--:*:--☆:*:--☆--:*:--☆--:*:--☆--:*:--☆:*:--☆--:*:--☆--:*
July 3, 2015
4,5 stars!
It is the most difficult book to review for me since a long time. And it is impossible to say something without giving the essential content away. It is why I won't say too much.
There are books we like a lot while reading them, and then we rate them high and sometimes some months later we can't even remember what they were about.
And there are books that stay with us for a long long time. Even if it's not easy always to put the word "like" talking about their plot.
They touch us in the most unforgettable way, they shake our comfortable reading world in the most provoking and disturbing manner and thereby make our reading experience utterly unique.
Father Figure is one of such books. It is sad and tragic and it is wrong in many feelings it raises, the story is confused and disturbing and seek but - OMG- HOW IT LET US INSIDE THIS LONELY SOUL...it is SO INTENSE, SO EMOTIONAL....SO UNFORGETTABLE!..
You know when you finish a book and just stare at the space in front of you...just stare...just stare....just stare...
This book will stay with me for a long long long time...
Ebook
September 14, 2016
Oh, baby, you are so sick.
Some characters are not built in order to be loved. They are supposed to be rejected, to be disgusting, to be considered monsters.
Gabriel is composed of that intrinsically dark matter real monsters are made. Rapists. Torturers. Murderers. People who don't feel guilt. Or enjoy making people suffer disregarding the other person's integrity and existence as a human being. Antisocial personality disorder, that sort of issues. Or what people usually know as 'psychos'. It's not that he enjoys hurting or humiliating people for the sake of it. He just doesn't stop to ponder whether or not his obsession or actions are bordering on insanity, and if he did, it would not be a matter to worry about, because he has already made up his mind. He wants it and the only question is how to get it. That's all. The prospect of whether or not the other person has the right to say something in the matter is just absent. He loves his father, in all the sense of the word, and that's all the permission he needs, notwithstanding what his very own father wants or doesn't want.
He knows the rules, he knows how to fit into society, he knows how to play the role. He knows them in order to know how to skip and avoid them. He's not sorry, he doesn't feel regrets, not because he doesn't want to, but because they simply don't exist. He doesn't feel what he does is morally bad, not been what that means. However, he hasn't lost the grasp on reality. He knows his obsession is one to be hidden, one society would ever accept, but he's apart from all of that, rules are beneath him, there is no reason why he should give up on it.
The love for his father deems irresistible and he only wants to revel in it, to achieve it no matter the cost, even if he destroys it by acting upon it. The ends are so compelling he doesn't even try to give any resistance. The means are only a nuisance, something he's forced to go through but which don't strike him as something to consider even for a moment. Not only to consider if they are justified or not, bad or good. Just, not worth to waste your time in even thinking in them.
You just want it. Everything else is irrelevant.
His voice is intriguingly seductive. It's not often we get to be inside the rawness of the mentally unstable antihero's head. It lures you into a trap. You resist but you cannot help it. You fall for him since the very beginning, since the very hint he's not exactly alright. He doesn't want to win your heart, he just states a fact with his creepily unashamed outlook on things, and you go for it.
You not only feel empathy, you even feel sympathy, for him. Compassion. Comprehension. Protectiveness.
The writing is so clever, so subtle and delicate, that you realize it's happening in front of your very eyes, since the very first scene, and you still take the bait nonetheless, disgusted and fascinated in equal parts.
There is beauty in perversion.
That's when you feel embarrassed because despite his own lack of humanity, you find out you are able to feel such things for him. To suffer for him. The need to comfort him. To love him. To save him from all harm.
And what does it say about you?
Nothing good. You are a sick bastard, too.
Gabriel is sick and twisted, and so much so. You are pushed out of your comfort zone constantly, being forced to witness his utter enthrallment for one person and one person only. Not a person per se, but the idea of a person.
The idea of a father.
You are repulsed to no end by what he does and how he does it and the reasons why he does it are so childish and strikingly tender he tempts you to forgive him. He's as tantalizing as that, a handsome devil who shows his own nakedness to the reader. He displays his true vulnerability with the most depraved of acts, with the most destructive of loves. He shatters his object of devotion and he shatters himself in the process, but that is collateral damage. It's a tragedy, but the alternative of letting go, of giving a different closure, it even more fateful. So, no secondary roads. His underdeveloped emotional sphere takes the reins of the situation and leaves all stability and sensibility behind. He is aware there is a expiration date but he does nothing to prevent it. He looks forward to it, even.
But the worst thing is, people around him are not immune.
Not even you.
The compulsion is stronger.
Awesome read.
The illustrations are incredible and so disturbingly erotic. Kudos.
Some characters are not built in order to be loved. They are supposed to be rejected, to be disgusting, to be considered monsters.
Gabriel is composed of that intrinsically dark matter real monsters are made. Rapists. Torturers. Murderers. People who don't feel guilt. Or enjoy making people suffer disregarding the other person's integrity and existence as a human being. Antisocial personality disorder, that sort of issues. Or what people usually know as 'psychos'. It's not that he enjoys hurting or humiliating people for the sake of it. He just doesn't stop to ponder whether or not his obsession or actions are bordering on insanity, and if he did, it would not be a matter to worry about, because he has already made up his mind. He wants it and the only question is how to get it. That's all. The prospect of whether or not the other person has the right to say something in the matter is just absent. He loves his father, in all the sense of the word, and that's all the permission he needs, notwithstanding what his very own father wants or doesn't want.
He knows the rules, he knows how to fit into society, he knows how to play the role. He knows them in order to know how to skip and avoid them. He's not sorry, he doesn't feel regrets, not because he doesn't want to, but because they simply don't exist. He doesn't feel what he does is morally bad, not been what that means. However, he hasn't lost the grasp on reality. He knows his obsession is one to be hidden, one society would ever accept, but he's apart from all of that, rules are beneath him, there is no reason why he should give up on it.
The love for his father deems irresistible and he only wants to revel in it, to achieve it no matter the cost, even if he destroys it by acting upon it. The ends are so compelling he doesn't even try to give any resistance. The means are only a nuisance, something he's forced to go through but which don't strike him as something to consider even for a moment. Not only to consider if they are justified or not, bad or good. Just, not worth to waste your time in even thinking in them.
You just want it. Everything else is irrelevant.
His voice is intriguingly seductive. It's not often we get to be inside the rawness of the mentally unstable antihero's head. It lures you into a trap. You resist but you cannot help it. You fall for him since the very beginning, since the very hint he's not exactly alright. He doesn't want to win your heart, he just states a fact with his creepily unashamed outlook on things, and you go for it.
You not only feel empathy, you even feel sympathy, for him. Compassion. Comprehension. Protectiveness.
The writing is so clever, so subtle and delicate, that you realize it's happening in front of your very eyes, since the very first scene, and you still take the bait nonetheless, disgusted and fascinated in equal parts.
There is beauty in perversion.
That's when you feel embarrassed because despite his own lack of humanity, you find out you are able to feel such things for him. To suffer for him. The need to comfort him. To love him. To save him from all harm.
And what does it say about you?
Nothing good. You are a sick bastard, too.
Gabriel is sick and twisted, and so much so. You are pushed out of your comfort zone constantly, being forced to witness his utter enthrallment for one person and one person only. Not a person per se, but the idea of a person.
The idea of a father.
You are repulsed to no end by what he does and how he does it and the reasons why he does it are so childish and strikingly tender he tempts you to forgive him. He's as tantalizing as that, a handsome devil who shows his own nakedness to the reader. He displays his true vulnerability with the most depraved of acts, with the most destructive of loves. He shatters his object of devotion and he shatters himself in the process, but that is collateral damage. It's a tragedy, but the alternative of letting go, of giving a different closure, it even more fateful. So, no secondary roads. His underdeveloped emotional sphere takes the reins of the situation and leaves all stability and sensibility behind. He is aware there is a expiration date but he does nothing to prevent it. He looks forward to it, even.
But the worst thing is, people around him are not immune.
Not even you.
The compulsion is stronger.
Awesome read.
The illustrations are incredible and so disturbingly erotic. Kudos.
September 13, 2018
4 stars!
Well dam! I just had to find out for myself didn’t I? And right they were! this book is very disturbing some parts I had to stop and just breath out, but I couldn’t stop reading it! Beyond all that it was very very sad! it honestly left me sad and with a heavy heart! I know I’ll be thinking about it for a long time regardless I do want to read the sequel I want to know what happened to Gabriel. I can understand this is not for everybody I won’t say read it or not read it, just it’s not an easy book and there’s absolutely no romance at all. 💔
Well dam! I just had to find out for myself didn’t I? And right they were! this book is very disturbing some parts I had to stop and just breath out, but I couldn’t stop reading it! Beyond all that it was very very sad! it honestly left me sad and with a heavy heart! I know I’ll be thinking about it for a long time regardless I do want to read the sequel I want to know what happened to Gabriel. I can understand this is not for everybody I won’t say read it or not read it, just it’s not an easy book and there’s absolutely no romance at all. 💔
September 5, 2014
This is a solid and strong 4*
Let's look at this more closely:
Illustrations and Cover = 5*
The illustrations and the cover were absolutely to die for. Not just beautifully executed, academically correct, but also picking up the inherent sadness of the plot.
Prose, SPaG and Writing = 4*
This was written in a direct, unpretentious and stark prose which perfectly caught the sadness of the theme and story. It rolled on in an inevitable manner, soft and strong at the same time. Satisfying and away from being very emotional, but its very starkness at times so perfect for what it told. There were a few formatting problems, but this just may as well be a problem with the ereader I used.
Storyline = 3*
Unlike many other readers I was neither shocked, nor overly taken with the content. I have no problem reading incest, it's not a strong taboo for me. It was pretty clear from the start where this would be heading, so when came what would have to come, it didn't stun me either. It was only logical. This story is the close look at a man on the other side of the line which demarcates madness, and as such it was very successful.
On the whole I was and still am far more impressed with the pictures.
Let's look at this more closely:
Illustrations and Cover = 5*
The illustrations and the cover were absolutely to die for. Not just beautifully executed, academically correct, but also picking up the inherent sadness of the plot.
Prose, SPaG and Writing = 4*
This was written in a direct, unpretentious and stark prose which perfectly caught the sadness of the theme and story. It rolled on in an inevitable manner, soft and strong at the same time. Satisfying and away from being very emotional, but its very starkness at times so perfect for what it told. There were a few formatting problems, but this just may as well be a problem with the ereader I used.
Storyline = 3*
Unlike many other readers I was neither shocked, nor overly taken with the content. I have no problem reading incest, it's not a strong taboo for me. It was pretty clear from the start where this would be heading, so when came what would have to come, it didn't stun me either. It was only logical. This story is the close look at a man on the other side of the line which demarcates madness, and as such it was very successful.
On the whole I was and still am far more impressed with the pictures.
June 16, 2013
Gabriel, a young cop, tracks and kidnaps his father, whose identity he discovered when his mother died. Clearly he's not looking for a typical family reunion. He does want to get close to his father though, in any way he can.
I was fully expecting some sick, twisted fun - and wasn't disappointed - but this book also delivered a sucker punch of an ending. It wasn't a surprising ending at all. You pretty much know where this is going. Still it managed to be both sad and touching, especially seeing one character's capacity for love and forgiveness despite what happened to him.
This one leaves a mark.
Also! Katsuya from In These Words cameos. As always, he brings up more questions than he answers. Why the grimace when Phillip breaks down? And why does he seem more sympathetic to the crazy son than the one who was wronged?
I was fully expecting some sick, twisted fun - and wasn't disappointed - but this book also delivered a sucker punch of an ending. It wasn't a surprising ending at all. You pretty much know where this is going. Still it managed to be both sad and touching, especially seeing one character's capacity for love and forgiveness despite what happened to him.
This one leaves a mark.
Also! Katsuya from In These Words cameos. As always, he brings up more questions than he answers. Why the grimace when Phillip breaks down? And why does he seem more sympathetic to the crazy son than the one who was wronged?
Read
March 12, 2014Ok, I am finished and ready for my decontamination shower.
March 5, 2014
So I really liked this. Not sure exactly what that says about me other than I have a propensity to adore majorly damaged antiheroes. This is not graphic in violence, but it is not an easy read.
Gabriel's always wanted something and when he sees the chance to get it. He does, regardless of consequences.
This is out there in the storyline of an obsessive and psychotic man and his desire, Uriel. If you like dark and can handle non-con and incest then take a spin--just buckle up first.
Gabriel's always wanted something and when he sees the chance to get it. He does, regardless of consequences.
This is out there in the storyline of an obsessive and psychotic man and his desire, Uriel. If you like dark and can handle non-con and incest then take a spin--just buckle up first.
September 12, 2014
Brilliantly seductive. Provoking. Arousing. Shocking. Quietly captivating.. and yet (for me) it's not enough to just elicit my intense reactions. In addition the writing must cultivate an intimate writer/reader connection in me. Seduce my time and emotional investment from me.
This does..just that..if not more so.
It's a full-on erotic assault on the senses with the controversial written content encased in equisitively provocative illustrations. The team effort of both (writer & artist) talented individuals really guarantees this to be a unique and memorable reading experience. The taboo implication is challenging but strangely-moving in its own way. Reflections long after the story is finished and over will persevere for every reader.
After reading this I wanted more similar homoerotic 'illustrative novels' (suggestions welcome) by this team or others, but except for the yaoi-manga 'graphic novels' (which-no offense intended-remind me of comic strips) I came up empty. I wish it wasn't the case..as I find this illustrative novel to be a powerful and profoundly effective combination. Unfortunate, it's not utilized more in this fictional genre.
Obviously, y-manga has a huge following for a reason..with its unquestionable talented graphics/artists, but past my initial visual interest, my ADD melts down to a sensory-overloaded-level with that typical y-manga visual cluster-fuck'd appearance.
This was a near-perfect balance..the best of both worlds.
September 11, 2018
This is one sick disturbing ass book. I don't even know what to say. Damn.
October 11, 2014
...4.5 Bewildered Stars...
You might can't fathom in what i'm about to say. But bare it with me!, Because i might be lost as you are!.
After Gabriel's mother died. He found one thing that his mother kept away from him. his birth certificate. Containing The name of someone, his mother had never mentioned. Uriel Blackstone.
And that's were everything begins......
Gabriel. a young cop tracks down his biological father. Stalks him in every way possible. Eventually Gabriel abducts him. For two weeks. Now you may think the reason why he did that, because he wants his revenge, for not knowing about him, nor whatever you wish to think.....
But NO, he simply did that to gain a loving father-Son relationship. after all those twenty-three years. he was excited to have a father again.
..
Don't get to excited!..
Friends. Gabriel's way to re-build a bonding relationship. not like us: To sit down and talk about our childhood, or our interests. ..etc.
His way is more intimate. PHYSICALLY . if you still did not understand, i'll explain it to you verbatim.
Yes, it's like that for Gabreil.
I had my moments where i wanted to throw my device. and just
Kickiku Neko. Absolutely Dazed me with her story. and might left me a bit twisted.especially with the Graphics. but that's alright.
The ending. got me really hard (in an emotional way.you Perv!!).
That Ring!. Seriously Cannot explain it to you. somethings are hard to explain.
Read This, if you can ignore the Mind Fuck, and look what's the meaning behind it.
Father Figure. is a Dark, Deeply Disturbing, and oh so Sad.
Just the way i prefer!.
"You can't help who you love"
"Just I can't help who i love."
Jahy, Thank you so much for introducing this book to me! MWAH!
You might can't fathom in what i'm about to say. But bare it with me!, Because i might be lost as you are!.
After Gabriel's mother died. He found one thing that his mother kept away from him. his birth certificate. Containing The name of someone, his mother had never mentioned. Uriel Blackstone.
And that's were everything begins......
Gabriel. a young cop tracks down his biological father. Stalks him in every way possible. Eventually Gabriel abducts him. For two weeks. Now you may think the reason why he did that, because he wants his revenge, for not knowing about him, nor whatever you wish to think.....
But NO, he simply did that to gain a loving father-Son relationship. after all those twenty-three years. he was excited to have a father again.
..
Don't get to excited!..
Friends. Gabriel's way to re-build a bonding relationship. not like us: To sit down and talk about our childhood, or our interests. ..etc.
His way is more intimate. PHYSICALLY . if you still did not understand, i'll explain it to you verbatim.
Yes, it's like that for Gabreil.
I had my moments where i wanted to throw my device. and just
Kickiku Neko. Absolutely Dazed me with her story. and might left me a bit twisted.especially with the Graphics. but that's alright.
The ending. got me really hard (in an emotional way.you Perv!!).
That Ring!. Seriously Cannot explain it to you. somethings are hard to explain.
Read This, if you can ignore the Mind Fuck, and look what's the meaning behind it.
Father Figure. is a Dark, Deeply Disturbing, and oh so Sad.
Just the way i prefer!.
"You can't help who you love"
"Just I can't help who i love."
Jahy, Thank you so much for introducing this book to me! MWAH!
November 27, 2013
This book has left me with a heavy heart, it is just so sad. It was disturbing, but the overwhelming sadness conveyed throughout this story is what struck me the most. This is not a story for the faint of heart and it is tragic. It follows a very disturbed young man called Gabriel who has an unnatural fixation on his father Uriel. The father is unaware of Gabriel's existence until the fateful day when Gabriel finds him... Gabriel...Uriel...both of the main characters have angels' names, just a thought that came to me, and it makes me wonder whether there is something underlying the choice in their names. In a way I suppose the father was sort of an angelic character, without a blemish on his soul - no matter how much Gabriel hurt and dirtied him. I felt so sad for Uriel, because he deserved none of what Gabriel heaped upon him. He came across as such a lovely natured man. And Gabriel, so demented, falling deeper and deeper into his unnatural love for his father, one that ended in a greater torment. What he did was horrendous, but I think his mind will punish him for it more than the system ever could.
The drawings were very well rendered, a number of them very sexual and because it is between a father and son they are disturbing (the son being the one causing the pain).
Again...this is leaving me with a heavy heart, what happened to Uriel so sad. I think this story will be hard to get out of my mind. BUT, I cannot give it less than 5 stars, because it affected me so much, and the writing and drawings were very well done. It was a hard story to put down, because I needed to know what happened. So sad...
The drawings were very well rendered, a number of them very sexual and because it is between a father and son they are disturbing (the son being the one causing the pain).
Again...this is leaving me with a heavy heart, what happened to Uriel so sad. I think this story will be hard to get out of my mind. BUT, I cannot give it less than 5 stars, because it affected me so much, and the writing and drawings were very well done. It was a hard story to put down, because I needed to know what happened. So sad...
April 9, 2014
SPOILERS IN THIS REVIEW. SO MANY SPOILERS.
Okay. Was this the most fucked up book I've ever read? *ponders* Maybe. Likely. But it's fucked up in a different way... in a psycho thriller way (my favorite).
Definitely true to the yaoi genre, which I often find difficult to convey through just writing. This book does have illustrations, yes, but I'd still mainly consider it a novel.
So, basically, avert your eyes from here on in unless you want some spoilers...
Okay? Okay.
So, this story involves rape, incest, and eventual murder. It's sad, it's sick, it's twisted. I've read other non-con books, and rapey books, and they are definitely, 100% not my thing. This book feels... different. It's a different kind of disturbing because the MC is so very mentally fucked up. He rapes his own absentee father after kidnapping him. Then he murders him and buries the body.
Some parts of this story were very erotic, and dare I say, enjoyable, so I'm going straight to hell for that one.
Uh, so, I'd recommend this to anyone, but probably have a strong stomach and don't be looking for any sort of butteries or HEA. If those are the only kinds of books you enjoy reading, keep on moving.
Okay. Was this the most fucked up book I've ever read? *ponders* Maybe. Likely. But it's fucked up in a different way... in a psycho thriller way (my favorite).
Definitely true to the yaoi genre, which I often find difficult to convey through just writing. This book does have illustrations, yes, but I'd still mainly consider it a novel.
So, basically, avert your eyes from here on in unless you want some spoilers...
Okay? Okay.
So, this story involves rape, incest, and eventual murder. It's sad, it's sick, it's twisted. I've read other non-con books, and rapey books, and they are definitely, 100% not my thing. This book feels... different. It's a different kind of disturbing because the MC is so very mentally fucked up. He rapes his own absentee father after kidnapping him. Then he murders him and buries the body.
Some parts of this story were very erotic, and dare I say, enjoyable, so I'm going straight to hell for that one.
Uh, so, I'd recommend this to anyone, but probably have a strong stomach and don't be looking for any sort of butteries or HEA. If those are the only kinds of books you enjoy reading, keep on moving.
December 31, 2016
*** This review will contain some spoilers!! ***
This, I did not see coming!!
I mean, I knew what I was getting into, I knew this book has ALL the things I ALWAYS very, very, VERY religiously avoid!
I cringe when there is incest in a book!
I never read a none HEA/HFN story!
I need romance!!
Yet, I picked it up, no idea why!?
I must say, that it took me a while to connect to the story and the MC's.
I did not feel, what I knew I should be feeling, for Uriel and Gabriel until I was close to the middle of the book, and to tell you the truth, I was thinking: "what's all the 'talk' is about??". But then, at about 50%...
BOOM!!!
A 100 pound hammer to the head!!
Drowning in feelings all over!
It was an amazing experience that is NOT for everyone (but if I read it, and "loved" it, maybe it is?? I dunno...)
It is NOT a romance!
I'm very glad I read it (thanks, again! Lena!!)
I kinda want more *saying embarrassed*... To know more...
I don't know...
This review is all over the place, just like the pieces of my broken heart right now!
This, I did not see coming!!
I mean, I knew what I was getting into, I knew this book has ALL the things I ALWAYS very, very, VERY religiously avoid!
I cringe when there is incest in a book!
I never read a none HEA/HFN story!
I need romance!!
Yet, I picked it up, no idea why!?
I must say, that it took me a while to connect to the story and the MC's.
I did not feel, what I knew I should be feeling, for Uriel and Gabriel until I was close to the middle of the book, and to tell you the truth, I was thinking: "what's all the 'talk' is about??". But then, at about 50%...
BOOM!!!
A 100 pound hammer to the head!!
Drowning in feelings all over!
It was an amazing experience that is NOT for everyone (but if I read it, and "loved" it, maybe it is?? I dunno...)
It is NOT a romance!
I'm very glad I read it (thanks, again! Lena!!)
I kinda want more *saying embarrassed*... To know more...
I don't know...
This review is all over the place, just like the pieces of my broken heart right now!
December 31, 2016
Wow that was one fucked up read.....going out of 2016 with a What-the-fuck!!
June 11, 2014
4.5 Heartbreaking, Forgiving Stars
A son finding his father .... a father finding his son ....
But this reunion is not quite what it seems.
Gabriel has been brought up by his mother. When she dies he decides to track his father down.
Gabriel is looking for something different from his father, he doesn't want to share him anymore.
This is a heartbreaking and upsetting story made even more so by pictures, of an obsessive love between a son and his father.
Its also a story of forgiveness which will break your heart..
My thoughts are simple and short because it is very hard to explain this disturbing story to do it justice.. And It won't be for everyone..
4.5 short but sad stars ...
A son finding his father .... a father finding his son ....
But this reunion is not quite what it seems.
Gabriel has been brought up by his mother. When she dies he decides to track his father down.
Gabriel is looking for something different from his father, he doesn't want to share him anymore.
This is a heartbreaking and upsetting story made even more so by pictures, of an obsessive love between a son and his father.
Its also a story of forgiveness which will break your heart..
My thoughts are simple and short because it is very hard to explain this disturbing story to do it justice.. And It won't be for everyone..
4.5 short but sad stars ...
July 26, 2016
Let's get one thing straight. The story rates about 4 stars. But it left such a bitter taste in my mouth that I'm not sure I'll ever want to recommend it to anyone, much less re-read.
The book pushed some of my boundaries and made me realise some new ones I didn't know I had. It's not for the faint of heart. You have to read it for yourself, though I don't know which is better: to have read it and visualise the world or not read it and miss out on such a disturbed depiction.
The book pushed some of my boundaries and made me realise some new ones I didn't know I had. It's not for the faint of heart. You have to read it for yourself, though I don't know which is better: to have read it and visualise the world or not read it and miss out on such a disturbed depiction.
March 6, 2014
This was a difficult book to read but there was just no way I was going to give up on it! It was heartbreaking, extremely sad and disturbing and for once I was glad I knew ahead of time about the ending. I absolutely adore the artwork, very beautiful and better than I've seen in a long time.
August 26, 2015
What the hell I just read?? 
Not a romance.
Extremely taboo, disturbing and sad.
Not a romance.
Extremely taboo, disturbing and sad.
January 5, 2025
*4.5 stars*
-->spoilers ahead<--
This was one sick, tragic, disturbed love story. For a Love Story it was.
There were many aspects of love showed in this illustrated novella, some of them maybe not as peachy as others to read about.
Gabriel’s obsessed love for his father was as fascinating to read about as it was creepy. The 1st person narrative fits perfectly to this type of story, since it would otherwise run the risk of getting a bit one-dimensional (as a reader, I would of course find myself strictly on the side of the victim, whereas here I found myself not always hating Gabriel, but sometimes also feeling pity.)
He is so obviously disturbed, that I feel guilty for any slightly „positive“ feelings I had towards him.
(Gabriel is however not the most disturbed POV I have read, that price goes to a certain Mr. Patrick Bateman. Now that is one sick bastard!)
There was also the love between Uriel and his deceased wife. This love, so apparent when described by Philip (e.g. when he explains how his father coped after the death of his wife) and also in the actions of Uriel, him never wanting to move on, and how he lives his life seemingly only for work and the occasional date. This was one major tear trigger for mw while reading. Still is, since it brings tears to my eyes just thinking about it now.
What was for me a point of surprise, was how „easy“ Uriel accepted his fate. There was anger, there was depression and there definitely was acceptance. But he never bargained for his life, he never begged or tried to persuade Gabriel to make another decision. Maybe he knew it was pointless after all, and just wanted a quick end. Maybe he just wanted to escape the horrible situation and reunite with his wife.
However perplexed I felt about his acceptance, it was one of the most beautiful moment in the book. Uriel’s love for Gabriel, as shown on Uriel’s death bed, had me again crying like a baby…
I could not properly understand it, honestly, how could he be so nice to his torturer?
But it made Uriel indeed an angel.
After finishing the book, I of course had to turn to my best friend google to check out Archangels…
Gabriel=„the strength of God“, „performs acts of justice and power „. Also known as the Angel of Revelation.
Uriel= „God is my light“, „leads us to destiny“ . Also known as the Angel of Repentance.
I think these definitions reflect to a certain extent the two different personalities of Gabriel and Uriel. For Gabriel, there was never any doubt in his crazy mind that what he did was right, and just. And Uriel, poor Uriel, portrays that most sacred thing within christianity - forgivness. He turns the other cheek and choose love instead of hate at the very end. It is for me as baffling as it is beautiful. (I am more of an „eye for an eye“ kind of person when looking for resolution in novels).
The Angel of Repentance has been described as fighting evil and offering hope to people who repent of their sins....Well, that does sound kind of familiar...
The Angel of Revelation is all about getting rid of confusion and "achieving the wisdom they need to make decisions, obtain the confidence they need to act on those decisions" (http://angels.about.com)
Also re the names, according to someone called Rudolf Steiner (philosopher), the archangel Uriel represents Summer, and Gabriel Winter, in the display of some spiritual activity... Well, Winter is very fitting for Gabriel, symbolically speaking, since he can't let go (frozen, static), where his father (the opposite Summer), is able to.
And finally, there was also the love between Philip and Uriel. The true love of a father and a son. Although I was never given a chance to really experience it, since they never „share screen“, it was all around in the things Philip says when talking to the police (how he even remembers which bag he gave to his father at Xmas 2 years ago). It was also in the more "obvious" grief, as expressed to Katsu in the end, and in how Uriel’s face expression changed when thinking about his „other“ son, and trying to protect him against the sick thoughts of Gabriel.
This was not the sickest story I read, but I loved the way the dementedness mixed with the emotional moments.
There will be a sequel to this book, and I can’t wait to see what the creators cook up;-)
-->spoilers ahead<--
This was one sick, tragic, disturbed love story. For a Love Story it was.
There were many aspects of love showed in this illustrated novella, some of them maybe not as peachy as others to read about.
Gabriel’s obsessed love for his father was as fascinating to read about as it was creepy. The 1st person narrative fits perfectly to this type of story, since it would otherwise run the risk of getting a bit one-dimensional (as a reader, I would of course find myself strictly on the side of the victim, whereas here I found myself not always hating Gabriel, but sometimes also feeling pity.)
He is so obviously disturbed, that I feel guilty for any slightly „positive“ feelings I had towards him.
(Gabriel is however not the most disturbed POV I have read, that price goes to a certain Mr. Patrick Bateman. Now that is one sick bastard!)
There was also the love between Uriel and his deceased wife. This love, so apparent when described by Philip (e.g. when he explains how his father coped after the death of his wife) and also in the actions of Uriel, him never wanting to move on, and how he lives his life seemingly only for work and the occasional date. This was one major tear trigger for mw while reading. Still is, since it brings tears to my eyes just thinking about it now.
What was for me a point of surprise, was how „easy“ Uriel accepted his fate. There was anger, there was depression and there definitely was acceptance. But he never bargained for his life, he never begged or tried to persuade Gabriel to make another decision. Maybe he knew it was pointless after all, and just wanted a quick end. Maybe he just wanted to escape the horrible situation and reunite with his wife.
However perplexed I felt about his acceptance, it was one of the most beautiful moment in the book. Uriel’s love for Gabriel, as shown on Uriel’s death bed, had me again crying like a baby…
I could not properly understand it, honestly, how could he be so nice to his torturer?
But it made Uriel indeed an angel.
After finishing the book, I of course had to turn to my best friend google to check out Archangels…
Gabriel=„the strength of God“, „performs acts of justice and power „. Also known as the Angel of Revelation.
Uriel= „God is my light“, „leads us to destiny“ . Also known as the Angel of Repentance.
I think these definitions reflect to a certain extent the two different personalities of Gabriel and Uriel. For Gabriel, there was never any doubt in his crazy mind that what he did was right, and just. And Uriel, poor Uriel, portrays that most sacred thing within christianity - forgivness. He turns the other cheek and choose love instead of hate at the very end. It is for me as baffling as it is beautiful. (I am more of an „eye for an eye“ kind of person when looking for resolution in novels).
The Angel of Repentance has been described as fighting evil and offering hope to people who repent of their sins....Well, that does sound kind of familiar...
The Angel of Revelation is all about getting rid of confusion and "achieving the wisdom they need to make decisions, obtain the confidence they need to act on those decisions" (http://angels.about.com)
Also re the names, according to someone called Rudolf Steiner (philosopher), the archangel Uriel represents Summer, and Gabriel Winter, in the display of some spiritual activity... Well, Winter is very fitting for Gabriel, symbolically speaking, since he can't let go (frozen, static), where his father (the opposite Summer), is able to.
And finally, there was also the love between Philip and Uriel. The true love of a father and a son. Although I was never given a chance to really experience it, since they never „share screen“, it was all around in the things Philip says when talking to the police (how he even remembers which bag he gave to his father at Xmas 2 years ago). It was also in the more "obvious" grief, as expressed to Katsu in the end, and in how Uriel’s face expression changed when thinking about his „other“ son, and trying to protect him against the sick thoughts of Gabriel.
This was not the sickest story I read, but I loved the way the dementedness mixed with the emotional moments.
There will be a sequel to this book, and I can’t wait to see what the creators cook up;-)
December 24, 2014
I am a person that firmly believes in Happy Endings and I avoid character death like it’s a plague or something but every once in a while I get into the mood to read something dark and evil and that’ when I decided to try Father Figure. The fact that this story is accompanied by very beautiful artwork also tempted me. Artwork that I can no longer look at without cringing which is a real shame! I rated this book 4 stars but maybe it deserves 5. After all, I am not willing to reread this but there is no need since I am not going to forget this anytime soon. Did I enjoy reading this? I don’t think enjoy is the right word. It’s not really possible to enjoy a story like this. I think reading these kind of books is about looking at really dark places and wonder what might be hiding there and why these dark corners exist to begin with and what is it that we can do to bring light into them and erase them for good, if that’s even possible.
So…are you willing to look?
Are you in the mood to read something EVIL? Something TWSITED?
Are you interested in stories that are told from the POV of a literally psychotic character with a damaged mind who seriously needs professional help?
Then it’s possible you might want to read this.
Let me say that the fact that this story is written by an actual Cop encouraged me to read this and finish it. This fact reassured me that I am reading a story written by a professional who might have had to deal with same cases in real life and has a purpose from writing down such a dark story on paper. This is not a fantasy created by a mind that seriously needs helps for imagining it to begin with. I feel that the author wants the readers to think twice before condemning a criminal who might be mentally damaged. Like she wants us to see that these people don’t deserve to die because they already live in a hell of their own and need kindness and even pity.
I believe I have a very high tolerance for evil stories but somewhere along this book, I wasn’t sure I could make it. I wasn’t crying my heart out for a beloved character or anything. I wasn’t even worried for the fate of the characters. I knew where the story was heading for. I was simply too disturbed to continue. The angst and the darkness in the story was touching me too deeply without me even realizing it. It’s the kind of story that you refuse to imagine in real life with real characters and REFUSE…is the keyword here!
This is the story of a love. A twisted, sick and disturbing love. Some people may say that love can’t be ugly. If it’s ugly, it’s not really love and it’s more of an obsession and that’s what I want to believe in but the lines blur together so closely in this book that it’s hard for me to name it.
I created a whole new shelf named “twisted” just to wedge this book somewhere in my reads and yet I don’t regret reading it. This book was indeed a very unique experience and I actually want to read more from this author despite the dark evil theme of her books. There are already great reviews for this book and I feel that I have said enough.
So…are you willing to look?
Are you in the mood to read something EVIL? Something TWSITED?
Are you interested in stories that are told from the POV of a literally psychotic character with a damaged mind who seriously needs professional help?
Then it’s possible you might want to read this.
Let me say that the fact that this story is written by an actual Cop encouraged me to read this and finish it. This fact reassured me that I am reading a story written by a professional who might have had to deal with same cases in real life and has a purpose from writing down such a dark story on paper. This is not a fantasy created by a mind that seriously needs helps for imagining it to begin with. I feel that the author wants the readers to think twice before condemning a criminal who might be mentally damaged. Like she wants us to see that these people don’t deserve to die because they already live in a hell of their own and need kindness and even pity.
I believe I have a very high tolerance for evil stories but somewhere along this book, I wasn’t sure I could make it. I wasn’t crying my heart out for a beloved character or anything. I wasn’t even worried for the fate of the characters. I knew where the story was heading for. I was simply too disturbed to continue. The angst and the darkness in the story was touching me too deeply without me even realizing it. It’s the kind of story that you refuse to imagine in real life with real characters and REFUSE…is the keyword here!
This is the story of a love. A twisted, sick and disturbing love. Some people may say that love can’t be ugly. If it’s ugly, it’s not really love and it’s more of an obsession and that’s what I want to believe in but the lines blur together so closely in this book that it’s hard for me to name it.
I created a whole new shelf named “twisted” just to wedge this book somewhere in my reads and yet I don’t regret reading it. This book was indeed a very unique experience and I actually want to read more from this author despite the dark evil theme of her books. There are already great reviews for this book and I feel that I have said enough.
February 13, 2018
*** 4,5 Fucked Up Hearbreaking Stars! ***
WARNING !
THIS IS NOT A ROMANCE, IT'S PSYCHOLOGICAL THRILLER.
This book fucked with my head, I read it in one sit and the end was BANG!.
This is a heartbreaking story about an abandoned child, what he need is love from his father. His father who lived happily with his family while he can only watched from afar. Heartbreaking.
Lonely Gabriel need some love, and "that" was the only thing he knew how to love.
It hurts, when all you need is to be loved and you can't have it.
I never thought I'm going to like this kind of story. This is one of book that you love to hate and hate to love.
Gabriel is a sicko, but I can't really hate him for doing that , even it's was creepy and sick and made my stomach churned and I need to puke for what he did to Uriel.
How could he did that to his own father, I hope I can understand.
Madness is the only answer, but what he said to Uriel, made me cry.
WARNING !
THIS IS NOT A ROMANCE, IT'S PSYCHOLOGICAL THRILLER.
This book fucked with my head, I read it in one sit and the end was BANG!.
This is a heartbreaking story about an abandoned child, what he need is love from his father. His father who lived happily with his family while he can only watched from afar. Heartbreaking.
Lonely Gabriel need some love, and "that" was the only thing he knew how to love.
It hurts, when all you need is to be loved and you can't have it.
I never thought I'm going to like this kind of story. This is one of book that you love to hate and hate to love.
Gabriel is a sicko, but I can't really hate him for doing that , even it's was creepy and sick and made my stomach churned and I need to puke for what he did to Uriel.
How could he did that to his own father, I hope I can understand.
Madness is the only answer, but what he said to Uriel, made me cry.
"I didn’t love him the way I loved you, but being with him made me feel wanted. Even if it was just a fantasy from a kid that really didn’t know what it was like to be wanted."
September 9, 2014
I could've lived just fine without ever reading this book.
The story gave a bad enough visual, then you turn a page, and boom, there is a drawing to emphasize it.
Wasn't my thing, at all. The writing was pretty good, but the topic was too dark, even for me.
Too much focus on the sexual acts, which were pretty shocking due to the taboo subject, and very graphic, not so much on the psychological aspects of it.
One thing is true - it's not a romance story, that's for sure.
The ending kind of left me wondering: what is the point of the story. I missed what author was trying to tell by it.
The story gave a bad enough visual, then you turn a page, and boom, there is a drawing to emphasize it.
Wasn't my thing, at all. The writing was pretty good, but the topic was too dark, even for me.
Too much focus on the sexual acts, which were pretty shocking due to the taboo subject, and very graphic, not so much on the psychological aspects of it.
One thing is true - it's not a romance story, that's for sure.
The ending kind of left me wondering: what is the point of the story. I missed what author was trying to tell by it.
November 25, 2013
✰✰✰✰
This was a heckuva twist for a taboo story. Gabriel was one fucked-up dude. No love from his mother and his father didn't even know he'd fathered Gabriel and woe to Uriel when Gabriel found out who his father was.
Taboo story and taboo illustrations so if this bothers you, do not pick this tale up, you will not like it. Gabriel narrates and even though you're horrified, you understand his reasoning. There is NO HEA.
This was a heckuva twist for a taboo story. Gabriel was one fucked-up dude. No love from his mother and his father didn't even know he'd fathered Gabriel and woe to Uriel when Gabriel found out who his father was.
Taboo story and taboo illustrations so if this bothers you, do not pick this tale up, you will not like it. Gabriel narrates and even though you're horrified, you understand his reasoning. There is NO HEA.
September 12, 2014
I am in the minority here, but this book didn't do much for me. I like a dark and twisted or taboo story, so that wasn't my issue here. I found the whole thing to be sad, but also kind of boring. I was expecting to find out more about Gabriel's background. How did he turn out this way? His abusive mother was mentioned briefly, but the details of his past were never really explored. I think I would have had more sympathy/empathy for him if I had known more about him.
June 7, 2017
9mar2016; I did a re-read of this book and, still I could not shake the feeling of
Gabriel is one fucked-up dude!
A deep obsession with his estranged father leads Gabriel Blackstone down a dangerous, twisting path.
I went blind into this book, there is no real blurb so I had no idea what it was about. It started okay, with nice images of the beautiful Amalfi Coast but the more I progressed in the book, I could not close my mouth, really jaw-dropping!
I really hated the main character for the things he did, but in the end I could only feel sorrow for his sorry arse. He was one fucked-up SOB, literally! I could feel the pain and despair of the second character and felt so sad for the way things ended. Although it made him a hero! This is one emotional roller coaster, but the illustrations were awesome!
Gabriel is one fucked-up dude!
A deep obsession with his estranged father leads Gabriel Blackstone down a dangerous, twisting path.
I went blind into this book, there is no real blurb so I had no idea what it was about. It started okay, with nice images of the beautiful Amalfi Coast but the more I progressed in the book, I could not close my mouth, really jaw-dropping!
I really hated the main character for the things he did, but in the end I could only feel sorrow for his sorry arse. He was one fucked-up SOB, literally! I could feel the pain and despair of the second character and felt so sad for the way things ended. Although it made him a hero! This is one emotional roller coaster, but the illustrations were awesome!
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