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Labial Linguistics
Saussure. Derrida. Chomsky. Graham.
In this groundbreaking new work, noted lecher and linguist Dr. Arthur Graham shakes the very field to its foundations, rendering all we thought we knew about labial language obsolete. As the first of its kind, Labial Linguistics represents a tour-de-force in the parole of pussy, the différance of dick, and the semiotics of sundry secretions and seminal spunk.
This book is not for sale on Amazon, nor is it available for purchase from anywhere else besides the author. Kindly PayPal five measly bucks* to arthur (dot) graham (dot) pub (at) gmail (dot) com, and your signed, limited-edition chapbook will be on its way.**
Includes the following pieces:
- Apt. C
- 1987
- Q&A
- I Want It to be Understood That I Don't Care About Being Understood
- Euphemistic Solipsistic
- That Scene in Jaws Where They're in the Water with the Fake Shark but a Real Shark Shows Up and Eats Richard Dreyfus and What About Bob Winds up Starring John Lithgow Instead
- The Gay Agenda
- Some Nights I Feel Just Like Harvey Keitel, All Strung Out and Stumbling Around Naked, But Then I Remember that I'm Just a Mediocre Author and Not a Bad Lieutenant
- The Great Zima Heist, Part 2 (Or, Travel-Sized Toiletries)
*Additional charges apply for overseas customers.
**While supplies last.
Review copies available upon request.
In this groundbreaking new work, noted lecher and linguist Dr. Arthur Graham shakes the very field to its foundations, rendering all we thought we knew about labial language obsolete. As the first of its kind, Labial Linguistics represents a tour-de-force in the parole of pussy, the différance of dick, and the semiotics of sundry secretions and seminal spunk.
This book is not for sale on Amazon, nor is it available for purchase from anywhere else besides the author. Kindly PayPal five measly bucks* to arthur (dot) graham (dot) pub (at) gmail (dot) com, and your signed, limited-edition chapbook will be on its way.**
Includes the following pieces:
- Apt. C
- 1987
- Q&A
- I Want It to be Understood That I Don't Care About Being Understood
- Euphemistic Solipsistic
- That Scene in Jaws Where They're in the Water with the Fake Shark but a Real Shark Shows Up and Eats Richard Dreyfus and What About Bob Winds up Starring John Lithgow Instead
- The Gay Agenda
- Some Nights I Feel Just Like Harvey Keitel, All Strung Out and Stumbling Around Naked, But Then I Remember that I'm Just a Mediocre Author and Not a Bad Lieutenant
- The Great Zima Heist, Part 2 (Or, Travel-Sized Toiletries)
*Additional charges apply for overseas customers.
**While supplies last.
Review copies available upon request.
- GenresFiction
24 pages, Unbound
Published July 22, 2016
2 people are currently reading
387 people want to read
About the author
Arthur Graham
80 books692 followersArthur Graham writes and edits for a living. Cofounder and former head editor of Rooster Republic Press. Current Editor in Chief of Horror Sleaze Trash.
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Displaying 1 - 19 of 19 reviews
April 13, 2019
what better way to celebrate mother's day than with a copy of labial linguistics? or with something called finally broken forever, which i was supposed to read and then didn't because i am a schmuck? come to arthur's book sale/giveaway and celebrate the place you emerged from your dear mother and caused her great pain and probably some naughty words!
https://www.goodreads.com/author_blog...
arthur graham is back with more potty-mouthed, surreal filth! but don't worry, there are also numerous pop culture references (although none of them are more current than 20 years or so ago, providing a second reason this probably wouldn't work as a kindergarten storytime read-aloud, which is a shame, since that seems to be the author's maturity level).
i love how all the reviews i write for this guy just devolve into roasts. he brings it out in me, which is inexplicable, him being such a lovely person and all. fuck it - i'm not gonna change my steez this late in the game!
eat a bag of dicks, graham!!
oh, right - review
Apt. C
i, myself, live in apt c. (well, apt c-3, if you're gonna get all precise about it), and this story really made me look around my place, wondering…
1987
i am ashamed to say how hard i laughed at this story. clearly arthur graham is resentful of the successful published poet billy corgan
wheee, i wrote a book!
what's next, graham?? are you going to go after that other supremely talented poet michael madsen?
but, yeah. this one made me genuinely lol, and i really loved the slow-burning bromance underlying this story of sex, drugs, violence, rodents, and chronological displacement. but hell, i love any story that ends in a threesome.
and he taught me what an eiffel tower was. in a specific context. so again - gratitude to the author.
Q&A
in which the author once again responds to his fans and critics, and even spouts some poetry, proving my point about how jelly he is of billy corgan. but it's not all softball questions - there's some diane sawyer-caliber grilling here as graham discusses his views on both satanism AND mormonism, politics, the gays, and his own pretentiousness, and delivers truisms like We all fall eventually, probably while staring off into the distance, stroking his chin-stubble.
or making this pose:
I Want It to be Understood That I Don't Care About Being Understood
subtext: he cares. deeply. he wants to be loved. love him, already.
Euphemistic Solipsistic
this was another story in which i learned something! arthur graham is one hell of an educator! and i think it's horrible that there are people out there steering their children away from him, as we learned two chapters ago, from the mouths of babes:
"my mommy said I'm not supposed to talk to you."
that kid will probably grow up only knowing three or four different slang expressions for a woman's genitals, and here i am, at my advanced age, STILL LEARNING, thanks to arthur graham. ninja boot! who knew?
That Scene in Jaws Where They're in the Water with the Fake Shark but a Real Shark Shows Up and Eats Richard Dreyfus and What About Bob Winds up Starring John Lithgow Instead
i myself, despise the movie What About Bob, even though sean of the house loves it. or maybe because sean of the house loves it. regardless, it's terrible, but i gotta say, this alt-universe version intrigues me, and it plays to my love of monsterporn, so if there's a reel of this floating around, hook a sister up.
The Gay Agenda
life lesson: sometimes, the truth is very disappointing. even if you learn it while sitting on the toilet.
Some Nights I Feel Just Like Harvey Keitel, All Strung Out and Stumbling Around Naked, But Then I Remember that I'm Just a Mediocre Author and Not a Bad Lieutenant
this is what it's like to be in arthur graham's head: stream-of consciousness musings that end up bashing another rock and roll legend. why you such a hater, graham?
The Great Zima Heist, Part 2 (Or, Travel-Sized Toiletries)
this pretty much sums up the central themes of graham's oeuvre: big trucks, bigfoot, essplosions, tinfoil hat conspiracy theories, guns, car chases, a cock that saves the day, and some questionable spank-bank imagery, like the unholy cinematic bastard child of michael bay and woody allen.
i imagine zima pairs well with popcorn.
i thank you for sending me this book, dr. graham!
i really learned a lot about life and love and what not to do to a sasquatch while he is pooping. which is more than i learn from most books.
come to my blog!
https://www.goodreads.com/author_blog...
arthur graham is back with more potty-mouthed, surreal filth! but don't worry, there are also numerous pop culture references (although none of them are more current than 20 years or so ago, providing a second reason this probably wouldn't work as a kindergarten storytime read-aloud, which is a shame, since that seems to be the author's maturity level).
i love how all the reviews i write for this guy just devolve into roasts. he brings it out in me, which is inexplicable, him being such a lovely person and all. fuck it - i'm not gonna change my steez this late in the game!
eat a bag of dicks, graham!!
oh, right - review
Apt. C
i, myself, live in apt c. (well, apt c-3, if you're gonna get all precise about it), and this story really made me look around my place, wondering…
1987
i am ashamed to say how hard i laughed at this story. clearly arthur graham is resentful of the successful published poet billy corgan
wheee, i wrote a book!
what's next, graham?? are you going to go after that other supremely talented poet michael madsen?
but, yeah. this one made me genuinely lol, and i really loved the slow-burning bromance underlying this story of sex, drugs, violence, rodents, and chronological displacement. but hell, i love any story that ends in a threesome.
and he taught me what an eiffel tower was. in a specific context. so again - gratitude to the author.
Q&A
in which the author once again responds to his fans and critics, and even spouts some poetry, proving my point about how jelly he is of billy corgan. but it's not all softball questions - there's some diane sawyer-caliber grilling here as graham discusses his views on both satanism AND mormonism, politics, the gays, and his own pretentiousness, and delivers truisms like We all fall eventually, probably while staring off into the distance, stroking his chin-stubble.
or making this pose:
I Want It to be Understood That I Don't Care About Being Understood
subtext: he cares. deeply. he wants to be loved. love him, already.
Euphemistic Solipsistic
this was another story in which i learned something! arthur graham is one hell of an educator! and i think it's horrible that there are people out there steering their children away from him, as we learned two chapters ago, from the mouths of babes:
"my mommy said I'm not supposed to talk to you."
that kid will probably grow up only knowing three or four different slang expressions for a woman's genitals, and here i am, at my advanced age, STILL LEARNING, thanks to arthur graham. ninja boot! who knew?
That Scene in Jaws Where They're in the Water with the Fake Shark but a Real Shark Shows Up and Eats Richard Dreyfus and What About Bob Winds up Starring John Lithgow Instead
i myself, despise the movie What About Bob, even though sean of the house loves it. or maybe because sean of the house loves it. regardless, it's terrible, but i gotta say, this alt-universe version intrigues me, and it plays to my love of monsterporn, so if there's a reel of this floating around, hook a sister up.
The Gay Agenda
life lesson: sometimes, the truth is very disappointing. even if you learn it while sitting on the toilet.
Some Nights I Feel Just Like Harvey Keitel, All Strung Out and Stumbling Around Naked, But Then I Remember that I'm Just a Mediocre Author and Not a Bad Lieutenant
this is what it's like to be in arthur graham's head: stream-of consciousness musings that end up bashing another rock and roll legend. why you such a hater, graham?
The Great Zima Heist, Part 2 (Or, Travel-Sized Toiletries)
this pretty much sums up the central themes of graham's oeuvre: big trucks, bigfoot, essplosions, tinfoil hat conspiracy theories, guns, car chases, a cock that saves the day, and some questionable spank-bank imagery, like the unholy cinematic bastard child of michael bay and woody allen.
i imagine zima pairs well with popcorn.
i thank you for sending me this book, dr. graham!
i really learned a lot about life and love and what not to do to a sasquatch while he is pooping. which is more than i learn from most books.
come to my blog!
July 26, 2016
Yay! More issues to ponder, thanks to the ever-wise Arthur Graham! Let me get my thoughts together, because I'm having a lot of them.
My first opinion is that once Apt. C is vacated, there is no going back. To that one, anyway. Moving on, Billy Corgan was only 12 in 1979. He apparently learned all about frustration from Moe the rat.
Arthur Graham is an enigma, and he wants us to know that he doesn't care whether or not we understand him. Ok. I don't care, either.
I've just been convinced that Satanism is a benign and sensible belief system. Should Arthur Graham ever interview the author of the Bible, maybe he can bring this up. Just sayin'.
Strange elements lurk in Sam's bar in Philly. If you dare to enter, first decide what kind of metaphor you actually are.
Rod Stewart ... meh ...
OH!!! The Great Zima Heist, Part II! Finally! Don't try this at home until you have been pee-tested. Bye-bye, Bigfoot!
My first opinion is that once Apt. C is vacated, there is no going back. To that one, anyway. Moving on, Billy Corgan was only 12 in 1979. He apparently learned all about frustration from Moe the rat.
Arthur Graham is an enigma, and he wants us to know that he doesn't care whether or not we understand him. Ok. I don't care, either.
I've just been convinced that Satanism is a benign and sensible belief system. Should Arthur Graham ever interview the author of the Bible, maybe he can bring this up. Just sayin'.
Strange elements lurk in Sam's bar in Philly. If you dare to enter, first decide what kind of metaphor you actually are.
Rod Stewart ... meh ...
OH!!! The Great Zima Heist, Part II! Finally! Don't try this at home until you have been pee-tested. Bye-bye, Bigfoot!
February 19, 2017
I interviewed Arthur about this book and more, and you can listen here!
If Woody Allen felt the need to write gratuitous descriptions of his own bodily fluids-- well that would be something new.
Anyway, this is great :)
If Woody Allen felt the need to write gratuitous descriptions of his own bodily fluids-- well that would be something new.
Anyway, this is great :)
March 21, 2020
Available now! Please see product description for ordering instructions.
July 23, 2016
I read this while drinking poppy tea. I'm now on a comedown.
All I do know is that Arthur is mental.
All I do know is that Arthur is mental.
May 8, 2017
Labial Linguistics is my favorite of Graham's chapbooks. This one had me laughing from cover to cover. But why the five stars? There is much more to this than cheap laughs, if you have the eye for it, from the meta moments to tongue-in-cheek references that authors and obsessive book readers like myself will enjoy. I could quote some lines here, but you will have to just read it yourself.
By the way, this book is part of a sale and giveaway going on right now:
www.goodreads.com/author_blog_posts/1...
By the way, this book is part of a sale and giveaway going on right now:
www.goodreads.com/author_blog_posts/1...
July 25, 2016
At first I was like this book is rubbish 1star!
then I saw the Q&A section and some of my questions were in there so I was like this book is ace 5Stars!
Then I thought, hang on he didn't ask permission, this book is totes rubbish 1star!
then he mentions my favourite smashing pumpkins "1979", awesome 5 stars!
then it turns out his dissing my favourite smashing pumpkins song "1979" boooo 1 star!
He then has a bunch of twats start a fight, word! 5 stars!
he then messes with movies, it is had enough for me to remember plots as it is, totally whack! 1 star!
he then sent an angry goose to stare at me until I gave the book 5 stars!
not to author it would be awesome if the great zima heist was made into a full length novel.
then I saw the Q&A section and some of my questions were in there so I was like this book is ace 5Stars!
Then I thought, hang on he didn't ask permission, this book is totes rubbish 1star!
then he mentions my favourite smashing pumpkins "1979", awesome 5 stars!
then it turns out his dissing my favourite smashing pumpkins song "1979" boooo 1 star!
He then has a bunch of twats start a fight, word! 5 stars!
he then messes with movies, it is had enough for me to remember plots as it is, totally whack! 1 star!
he then sent an angry goose to stare at me until I gave the book 5 stars!
not to author it would be awesome if the great zima heist was made into a full length novel.
July 26, 2016
What a cheek (but that’s enough about Arthur’s bum) – Arthur Graham has regurgitated much of this book from his previous blogs and Ask The Author answers. But still, I have to admit that’s a good thing, ‘cos I enjoyed reading these even more the second time round. And there’s plenty of new stuff too.
I mean, where else will you find a book which includes Bigfoot from Harry and the Hendersons, shenanigans of sexual scents and stains, and kneeing Billy Corgan in the balls?
Yep, Arthur Graham is up to his usual high standard of dark humour and he makes it plain that he doesn’t care what anyone thinks about him.
(“Ah, he’s going for that ‘loner-hipster-cool-don’t-give-a-fuck-dollar-market’,” I hear Bill Hicks say.)
I mean, where else will you find a book which includes Bigfoot from Harry and the Hendersons, shenanigans of sexual scents and stains, and kneeing Billy Corgan in the balls?
Yep, Arthur Graham is up to his usual high standard of dark humour and he makes it plain that he doesn’t care what anyone thinks about him.
(“Ah, he’s going for that ‘loner-hipster-cool-don’t-give-a-fuck-dollar-market’,” I hear Bill Hicks say.)
May 9, 2017
This may be one of my favorite titles and covers ever. The content isn't to shabby either.
December 8, 2017
Another great collection, had me laughing out loud! My only complaint is that there wasn't more.
July 23, 2016
This book was a quick read. Very quick. It's really only ten pages. I made these ribs for dinner tonight and put a nice rub on them that has made me rather gassy. Or maybe it was just the ribs, all that grease and pork fat. I farted while I was on the second page and could still smell it by the time I finished. That's a quick read. I would have given this book five stars but I learned a lot of terrible things about Arthur Graham while reading it. He doesn't seem to like The Smashing Pumpkins very much. Way to be a self-loathing 90's kid, brah. And I also learned that he practices safe sex. Who the fuck even does that anymore? Have you no sense of adventure? Maybe it's cuz I've been married for a while, but I thought condoms went the way of Zima. Oh wait is that still around too?
August 19, 2016
1) spunk-stain ✓
2) Billy Corgan ✓
3) moose knuckle ✓
4) ham wallet ✓
5) self-loathin’ ✓
6) self-lovin’ ✓
7) questions ✓
8) answers ✓
9) Johnny motherfuckin’ Lithgow ✓
10) the image of “Helena Bonham Carter and Isabella Rossellini scissoring on a pile of bludgeoned baby seals” evoked in order to prevent a urination-suppressing erection that would’ve slowed down a landspeeder towing a trailer of Zima being chased by a monster truck driven by Bigfoot ✓
Uh-oh. Guess I just read another chapbook from that silver-tongued rapscallion Art Graham!
2) Billy Corgan ✓
3) moose knuckle ✓
4) ham wallet ✓
5) self-loathin’ ✓
6) self-lovin’ ✓
7) questions ✓
8) answers ✓
9) Johnny motherfuckin’ Lithgow ✓
10) the image of “Helena Bonham Carter and Isabella Rossellini scissoring on a pile of bludgeoned baby seals” evoked in order to prevent a urination-suppressing erection that would’ve slowed down a landspeeder towing a trailer of Zima being chased by a monster truck driven by Bigfoot ✓
Uh-oh. Guess I just read another chapbook from that silver-tongued rapscallion Art Graham!
February 16, 2017
could have been better....er....i mean longer. yep. longer and better. ..story of my life.
July 24, 2016
It's very freeing to read Graham. He makes a lot of things work in a piece that you wouldn't really think would work. The result is an extremely entertaining read, but always somewhat of a reminder that you might have been thinking of writing too narrowly before. Definitely something that's needed. Also, it's got that wild and funny Graham crudeness that keeps me coming back to this author. Definitely a good read.
September 13, 2016
If there wasn't a salacious grin on my face, I was laughing outright. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this chapbook & will certainly be hunting for more of Arthur Graham.
Want to read
April 6, 2017"Labial Linguistics represents a tour-de-force in the parole of pussy, the différance of dick, and the semiotics of sundry secretions and seminal spunk."
You gotta give it up to Arthur Graham for Oscar Wilde-like wordplay that good.
There is not one part of this that I do not need in my life immediately! ~sg
January 3, 2018
dude wtf?
October 11, 2016
I honestly never know what to expect but I do know that I am never disappointed and I am always looking for more by the time I get to the end of the book. As always, I can't wait for more.
Displaying 1 - 19 of 19 reviews